Page 27 of A Dream Shrouded in Fury
They were right there.I could force them to fall and let them land in the taut silence, damning the fae to Thorn’s orders.I acknowledged the sentence against myself.Much as it would pain me, fifty years of limited freedom was the least I deserved for what I’d done and far more lenient than Thorn could have offered.Killing the fae, though… It would be the best, safest move for the Gloaming Fury.
Or so everyone else believed.
As I stood there, weighing the balance between what I should do against what I wanted, I realized they had no fucking idea what they were talking about.Yes, our secrecy was important.Yes, we would run the risk of being destroyed if anyone discovered we were here and reported us to the palace.But we were also cutting ourselves off from the world in ways that put us in a different kind of danger.We risked becoming stagnant.
What felt like forever ago, Thorn had accused me of being naive in wanting more, but couldn’t she see that she was damning us to extinction by demanding less?I’d spent my life believing the slop we called food was enough, but Jael had opened my eyes to the fact that we were living on scraps.I’d believed vampires were the only group worth knowing, but how many stories from other places would we never hear?How much music were we missing out on?
I had no intention of suggesting we open ourselves up to threat, but a life without risk—without change… was that a life at all?
So instead of shrugging off the confused emotions coursing through me, instead of falling into line, I said, “I want to help them escape.”
Cliff’s jaw dropped, and he blinked as though his thoughts had come to a jarring stop and needed time to wake up.“Kalla, we—we can’t.What are you even saying?Thorn would kill us.And she’d be within her rights to.What the fuck?You barely made it out with your life, and you want to tempt fate a second time?”
Fate.Not a concept I believed in generally, but right now, I felt like the threads of destiny had me in a chokehold.
I ran my hands over my hair and paced the length of the room.“Maybe I’ll die,” I conceded, “but I’m doing it anyway.”
“Do you really believe his life is worth more than yours?”
“Of course not,” I snapped.“But dammit, Cliff, if I’m not willing to fight for something I believe in, what’s the point of living?”
He clapped his mouth shut, his nostrils flaring with every incredulous breath, and it took him a moment to summon his next thought.“So you’re going to walk them out through the tunnel?In front of the entire fury?Think about this, Kal.”
“I am thinking.I’m thinking that a few nights ago, I wasmiserablehere.I felt trapped and stifled.I love my family, but you and Thorn both pointed out there’s more to wake up for than mindless hunting.Jael showed me what I’m missing.I might not be able to be with him, but if his death is on my hands…” The truth ground my feet to a halt, and I turned around to look my best friend in the eye.“I think I’ll feel empty for the rest of my life.Thorn might as well kill me.”
For a few, slow heartbeats we stared at each other, both of us working through what I’d said.
I’d meant it.I would survive Jael not being here.I would probably get past it and maybe eventually mate with some vampire male for the sake of filling my nights with someone’s company.But in fifty years, nothing and no one else had brought me to life the way he had.
His absence would leave a void in my chest, one that mirrored the darkness he had carried with him for the past six years, but at least I would have given him a chance to find the peace he sought.
Cliff watched me, his dark brown eyes scanning my face, delving deep into my gaze as though trying to draw out my soul to assess it for cracks or madness, but in the end, his spine rounded and he gave a slow, hesitant nod.“All right, Kal.I’ll help you.By the blood, this could be a disaster, but I’ll help you.What do you need?”
I chewed on my lips and paced the room one last time while I cobbled together a plan, fear and gratitude welling inside me.“First we need more people.We can’t do this on our own.Then… Then we need a distraction.”
Jael
XXI
I was still sitting on the floor when the curtain ruffled and four vampires strode in.
Hethyr and Pimmin jumped to their feet immediately, while Corban remained slumped where he was, lazily resisting whatever our enemy had come to do.
It wasn’t until I spotted Kalla’s crimson hair among the others that I slid my spine up the wall.
Had she come to kill me herself?I didn’t know if I hoped for it or feared it.To finally learn what those fangs felt like sinking into my neck would be one last gift before the nothing took me, but to think she might carry the guilt of ending my life—to think that my death might haunt her for the rest of her long years… that would crush me.
Unless it wouldn’t haunt her.Unless my decision to choose the Coynfare had shifted whatever existed between us and she agreed that my death was the best way forward.In which case I couldn’t blame her.We both had our duty.
I pushed away from the wall to face her, standing straight and tall and summoning whatever courage remained to me.
The other vampires spread out, barring our way and leaving Kalla on her own in the centre of them.
I swallowed the lump in my throat and stepped forward, pretending I could protect my comrades from whatever wrath she was about to unleash.
Her blue gaze darted across my face, her pupils darkening, but it was the only reaction she gave to seeing me.I wondered what she was reading off me.Could she recognize my apology?My regret?My wish that I could have one more night with her?The one we’d shared had been far too short.
“Are you here with our sentence?”I asked without anger or accusation.
