Page 65 of Eternal Ruin
Susenyos grinned. “Suit yourself because I won’t deny myself. I’ve tried in the past, but it’s difficult to be anything but happy in this room.”
She watched him in astonishment as he moved back and forth and side to side in a dance in the cramped space. Her mouth dropped.
“You look absolutely ridiculous,” she whispered.
“Only those afraid of joy say such things.”
She raised a brow, knowing what he was doing. “I’m not afraid.”
“Prove it.”
Staring into his bright eyes, she surrendered to the room’s call. Allowed theirjoined minds to heighten all traces of happiness. Fireflies burst into life before her vision. Susenyos reached for her hand, pieces of light hovering between them. Carefully, she slipped her hand into his. It was the same temperature as hers, same texture. They started a slow dance, keeping their distance. It was like the reverse of the Ballad of Eyes, their eyes fixed on one another so they could not hide any expression that flickered past. The instruments picked up, a set of clapping hands, people cheering. Kidan’s feet moved faster and faster, matching his pace. She felt both a little drunk and like she was flying. Throwing her head back, Kidan laughed. They spun into a different universe. This room, this space was filled with such light, she couldn’t imagine anything touching her. Them. When she lifted her lashes to him, Susenyos was watching her with raw awe, hunger, as if she was the sun and he was rushing to capture her beauty.
They must have danced for hours, began touching each other without noticing, pulling one another into a fit of nonsensical laughter, knocking over brooms and buckets and when their feet could no longer move, they collapsed on the floor, their heads touching the wall, legs bent awkwardly to fit into the room. “I never want to leave this room,” she confessed, unable to stop herself from laughing again. Whenever she did laugh, he traced the curve of her lips, making sure the sound was coming from her. It made her want to do it again and again. They breathed deeply in sync and the house exhaled with them. The music washed over them and sank into their skin, building into a euphoric high.
It was such a small room, but it was a glimpse into what could be. If they could turn this entire house into this, what would their life look like?
“All this time… who knew joy was trapped in a broom closet,” Kidan breathed in astonishment. A part of her knew this wasn’t real but she ignored it.
Susenyos’s face smiled lazily, drunk on it all. “Much better to lie in this room than the hallway, don’t you think?”
She nodded urgently.
“The people clapping and cheering, and the music… it all takes me back to Farah City. The Nefrasi were the happiest then.”
“You must miss them,” she said softly. “The Nefrasi.”
“More than I thought possible.” He gave a sad smile. “It rarely happens, you know.”
“What?”
“Each room is meant to represent different things to each person, but our rooms have melted into one another. You feel joy where I feel joy. Pain where I feel pain. It’s rare.”
“You keep saying that.” She turned her cheek to the stone floor. It wasn’t cold. Nothing about this room was cold.
“Because it’s the truth.” He furrowed his brow, trying to figure out why. He didn’t feel ancient here, nor a monster, but merely a boy trapped in time. His twisted hair fell from his face, clearing his vision so he could study her better. If she wanted, Kidan could reach out and trace his cheek. It would feel as natural as breathing.
She wanted to say what she was thinking without worrying about the consequences. Wanted to be as free as she was on Cossia Day.
Kidan took note of his long lashes and clear brown skin.
“Maybe it’s the room talking but you’re kind of beautiful,” she whispered, the whole universe enclosed in his dark eyes.
Susenyos’s smile was full, and it lit the ceiling aglow. “It’s the room.”
She sighed contentedly and lay back, watching the roof sparkle with little fireflies.
“Am I beautiful in this room?” she asked, reaching for the buzzing insects that melted onto her palm.
Susenyos propped himself up to make sure she saw him and said with deep regret, “I’m afraid I find you beautiful in every room.”
Kidan’s lips curved and he tracked them greedily.
“Even in the ones where I tried to kill you?”
“Especially in those. Death had never looked so beautiful until it was delivered by your hands.”
Her ears buzzed with the fireflies and heat traveled to her stomach. What was happening to her body? Some part of her told her to flee. This easiness wasn’t real and wouldn’t last long.
