Page 12 of Breakaway
"You've been watching?" I ask, face flushing.
Of course, he's been watching. He's been sitting beside me all night, and I only convinced myself he wasn't paying any attention because I was too curious to change it to something a little more suitable for company.
"I've lived on the planet," Zill says. "Whatever they show, I've seen ten times more vulgar either in person because they will have sex in front of anyone when they're in their gathering spaces or in their heads. They're easily the species that thinks about reproducing and how to do it more than any other."
"Wow," I say, though it does a poor job of expressing just how in awe and slightly scandalized I am by their culture. "Maybe when this all blows over, I'll go there for a bit."
I'm attempting to make a joke, but the stormy expression on Zill's face and the way his shadows go eerily still make me think it doesn't land. That, or his weird mind powers are hearing something that might be a threat. He grinds his teeth for a moment, his gaze piercing something on the television screen. Then, as if it was just a weird little blip, he faces me, body relaxed, shadows slowly moving a bit more.
"Were you wanting to stay up later?" Zill asks, turning his comm screen on once more to check the time or maybe a notification.
"It's getting late," I say, more so because Zill looks like he's ready to leave, and I don't think he wants to leave me on my own unless I request it.
He stands from the couch, glaring daggers at the little pile of blankets I have to make myself a little bed out here. He shoots me a look that makes me think he's going to try to argue about this again, but instead of doing it, he just sighs and shakes his head.
"My shadows will be alert all night," he tells me. "If they hear anything or think there's something going on, they'll wake me."
"If you need to get up at any point, don't worry about waking me. There's a fifty-fifty chance I'm not too asleep anyway," I tell him, smiling a bit to try to help make him feel better. If anything, he looks more and more tense as he steps away from me. Maybe I should've relented about taking the bed, but he'll be grateful I gave it to him in the morning when he's not walking around with a crick in his neck.
Zill checks the front door and then the balcony before standing in the hall entrance. "Promise me that if you get worried, you'll wake me or press one of the panic buttons."
"Promise," I tell him, and it's not even a lie. Now that I've seen how revolting some people can be, I'm perfectly happy to press the panic buttons and let people who are much bigger and stronger than I am do what they're trained to do.
"Good night, Reese," Zill says, my name sounding more pleasant on his lips than it's ever sounded before. I remind myself that all of this is fake, that he has no interest in me at all. Thinking otherwise is delusional.
"Good night, Zill." The words are a whisper said much too late since he's already closing the door to my bedroom.
Ignoring how I might be more than a little attracted to my new bodyguard, I click on 'Once Upon a Knot' and start up the next episode. I have a feeling that I won't be falling asleep any time soon, but maybe one day I'll feel safe enough to sleep through the night again.
CHAPTER 6
ZILL
Breaking News! No sign of Empress. The pop star hasn't made an appearance in over a week. Here's our speculations on what she's up to.
It's been almost a week of staying in Reese's apartment, and as much as I want to say things have gotten easier, they've also gotten much more difficult. She's fun and charming, and it's easy to want to be around her. The problem with that is it's becoming increasingly difficult to remind myself that she's a client, not a friend, let alone a lover. Not that I have any experience with lovers.
To my utter horror, I had to message Kolos for advice on not pursuing a bond since he's the only one I know who has one that rejected him. To say he wasn't eager to help me is an understatement. Once I told him I was in a similar predicament, just my human had no idea I was interested in her at all, he was more forthcoming. However, his help consisted of telling me to take myself in hand. Frequently.
As much as I hate to admit it, that advice has come in handy quite a bit. I want to remain professional around Reese, even ifmy body doesn't always comply with those wants, such as right now.
I'm locked away in the bathroom with the excuse of showering before we begin our day. I resigned myself to the idea of being aroused by Reese even if I don't want to be after ignoring Kolos's advice for a couple of days. By the time I thought I was going to explode if I shifted against the bedsheets a little too forcefully, I took his advice and have been doing it every morning during my showers.
My shadows have no qualms about thinking about the human we want to bond with. They already see her as an inevitability, so why would they feel any remorse over making me imagine what she'd look like bare and flushed underneath me with my shadows wrapped tight around her, holding her in place as I slid between her legs, the sounds of pleasure she would make. I groan, my forehead resting against my forearm where it's pressed to the tiles. The warm water from the shower is flowing down the muscles of my back as they tense in anticipation of what's to come. Thankfully, besides pelting me with thoughts of Reese, my shadows remain wrapped around my legs, not joining me in the self-pleasure I have to indulge in.
A soft knock on the bathroom door has me squeezing myself a bit tighter.
"No rush, but Marr went down to get the transport." Reese's voice coming through has the unfortunate effect of having me release all over the tiled wall and bottom of the tub. I clench my teeth, eyes screwed tight as I attempt to keep myself from making any noise to let the woman know what I'm doing in here.
"Zill?" Reese calls my name through the door, and just like every time she says it, my cock gives a little jerk.
"Yeah," I respond, my voice a bit gruff and winded. "I'll be done in a second."
"Okay, sorry for interrupting," Reese says.
I want to tell her she has nothing to apologize for, considering I'm the one taking longer than I should in her shower, but I leave it as it is. She's probably already back in the living room anyway, and I need to clean up my mess before getting out of the shower.
Thankfully, Reese has a detachable shower head, and I use it to spray down what I can. I'm not proud of what I've been reduced to, but this is far better than walking around funny all day because I'm attempting to hide how stiff I am. No, this is for the best, so Reese doesn't find out just how unprofessional I'd like this whole arrangement to be.
