Page 46 of Born into Madness
“I don’t know much,” I admit. “She’s smart, I know that, and hard working. She volunteers at an animal shelter and works part time at a vet clinic near the university. I think she might be planning to be a vet. I’m not sure. We haven’t had a chance to really talk. I’ve mainly been watching from a distance.” I grin and add, “She’s taking a Russian class, and I don’t think she’s terrified of me anymore.”
“Has she seen your face?” Mia asks, while handing me my phone back.
“Part of it. She knows my name, though.”
Mia sits back and studies me. After a few seconds, she says, “You really like her, don’t you?”
“I do.”
“And you don’t want to hurt her?” Her voice is hesitant, but I can tell there’s no judgment in it. No matter what answer I give, my sister won’t judge me. She never has.
“No, I don’t.” I look back at my phone, watching as Cyn brushes her hair back in a move that’s second-nature to her, and I grin at the clear annoyance in the movement. She may hate her hair, but I love it enough for the both of us.
“I honestly wasn’t sure this day would ever come,” Mia says, “but I’m happy for you, and I can’t wait to meet her.”
“Maybe I’ll bring her for your karaoke night,” I tease.
“You can bring her to witness Niki getting his nose pierced instead,” she fires back.
I pocket my phone and say, “Maybe I will, but don’t say anything to the others yet, okay? Niki probably already knows because I asked him to direct this feed to my phone instead of his, but no one else knows anything, and she has no idea who I am or what I do.” I sigh and add, “No doubt she’ll come to her senses and tell me to get lost and never come back.”
Mia raises a brow at me. “Would you listen to her if she did?”
I grin and shake my head. “No way in hell. She’s mine.”
“I won’t say anything to the others,” Mia promises. “I can’t wait to meet the woman who not only tamed Chort but also my crazy-ass older brother.”
“I think you’ll like her, but I’m not ready to introduce her around just yet.” The truth is I’m not ready to share her yet. I want more time where it’s just the two of us. She needs to get to know me before she learns about what I do. She knows enough, but she doesn’t realize that night was a common occurrence. The killing wasn’t a heat-of-the moment kind of thing. I’m not sure if she’s ready for that kind of brutal honesty yet, and I don’t want to scare her off.
If she gets scared, she’ll run, and then I’ll have to chase.
And the idea of doing that is far too appealing to think about right now.
Chapter 8
Cynthia
Itry not to be upset when Sasha doesn’t come back. It’s ridiculous towanthim to come back. I should be running in the opposite direction, calling campus security so they can watch for him, and I sure as hell should be calling the police and letting them know what’s going on, but I don’t do any of those things. Instead, I let my mind wander as I slowly work my way through my chemistry homework, imagining the way it had felt to kiss him, the heat of his tongue as it ran up my neck, the strength in his arms as he held me, and the light-blue eyes that never seem to miss a single detail.
When I start to think about his sculpted jawline and the impossibly large bulge I’d felt in his pants, I let out an annoyed grunt and put my focus back on my classwork. It doesn’t last long. Every few minutes, my mind inevitably returns to him—the unhinged man I’ve apparently become obsessed with.
“You sure do know how to pick ‘em,” I mutter to myself before I finally give up and slam my textbook shut.
Wanting a shower to clear my head, I grab my stuff and head down the hall. I take my time, lathering up my hair before slowly rinsing it clean. It’s a time-consuming process that I usually hate, but Sasha’s words keep creeping into my head,the way he’d told me he loves my hair and the fascinated way he always looks when he plays with it. He makes me see my hair differently. Instead of the unruly locks that were always a constant source of ridicule from first grade on up, I see the different shades of red that Sasha loves to study and the thick, soft waves that he loves to touch.
My head is at war with itself. It’s holding two very different sides of Sasha, and the side of him I saw today, the one that was so sweet and gentle with me, is starting to win out and overshadow the side I saw that Friday night.
I can’t believe I’m seriously making excuses for murder, but I am, and I know I am because I’ve yet to tell Sav about today’s visit, or the note he left me, or the fact that he’s been sneaking into my room and following me around. There’s no way for me to explain it to her in a way that will make sense. I need to wait until I know him better, until he’s at least comfortable enough around me to reveal his face, and then she can meet him. I know once she gets to know him, she’ll realize he’s not the guy we initially thought he was.
After my shower, I order a veggie pizza and have it delivered to my dorm, and then I settle down and watch a movie while I try to pretend that I’m not hoping Sasha will show up. Instead of his large body walking through the door, though, it’s my roommate. She takes one look at me sprawled out on my bed with a half-empty pizza box and gives me a disgusted look before turning her back and grabbing the tiny black skirt that she saves for when she knows she’s going to get laid.
“I won’t be back tonight,” she says, which surprises me because she usually doesn’t tell me her plans, but then she adds, “I met a really hot guy earlier and he’s taking me to a club.” Leaning in, she uses her mirror to reapply her red lipstick. When she’s done, she glances back over at me. “Maybe you could meet someone, too, if you didn’t sit on your ass so much.”
I want to throw what’s left of my pizza at her face, but I resist. I also want to tell her that I just recently had an insanely hot guy in our room, but I keep my mouth shut about that, too. I’m not much for confrontation, so I pretend her comment didn’t cut me to the bone and turn my attention back to the show I’m watching.
“Whatever,” she mutters before grabbing her bag and leaving the room.
With my appetite gone, I shove the pizza box away and curl onto my side. I try not to feel like an idiot, but it’s hard not to easily imagine that everything I thought was true this afternoon with Sasha was nothing but a big fat lie. I feel like a dumbass. The man is capable of murder, and yet I believed every sweet touch, every gentle word like a starved woman, desperate for the attention of a man.
