Page 32 of Cinderella and the Daddy
Leo and I spend most of our days together. When he does his schoolwork with the nanny, I usually end up in the garage. I don’t have anything to fix, but I’ve noticed a few of the guards park their cars in the garage. They’ve asked me to take a look.
I don’t know if Luka told them to do it or if they really need the work done.
Either way, it works for me.
Unfortunately, there are no cars to work on today.
Leo chatters beside me as I hand him a clean rag and show him how to properly clean a wrench.
"Cindy?"
"Yeah, kiddo?"
"Are you staying forever?"
The question hits me like a physical blow. I freeze, the socket wrench clenched in my hands.Forever. As if forever is something I have any control over anymore. As if my future is anything more than a series of choices made by other people.Powerfulpeople who view me as a commodity rather than a person.
I’m collateral.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
"I don't know," I answer honestly, because lying to children feels like a special kind of cruelty. "Would you want me to?"
He nods vigorously, smearing grease across his cheek. "Dad seems less angry when you're here. And you make really good pancakes."
Less angry. Christ, if this is Luka on his best behavior, I can't imagine what he's like when he's truly unleashed. But Leo's observation settles something in my chest, a warmth I don't want to examine too closely.
Like belonging.
I’ve never belonged. Never truly had a family. I had my mom, but with her troubles and then her illness that took her away, I never had that stability that came from having a family.
A real home.
This isn’t a home. Not for me. Luka has done a great job making it a home for Leo, but I don’t fit.
Leo doesn’t need to know all of that. “It’s beautiful here,” I say. “I like it.”
“Me too.”
That evening, I find myself in Leo's room, the boy tucked beneath dinosaur-print sheets, clutching a stuffed tiger that's seen better days. The book in my hands is worn. It’s the same story about a knight and a dragon that Leo has already memorized, but still insists on hearing.
I can pretty much read the book without looking at the words.
"And the knight said to the dragon," I read and then clear my throat. I deliver the performance of a lifetime. "We don't haveto be enemies." I use my dragon voice. The one Leo absolutely loves.
My princess voice is all high and flowery.
"Do you think that's true?" Leo asks, his voice sleepy. "That enemies can be friends?"
"Sometimes," I answer, thinking of the man who brought me here against my will. The man I should hate but find myself drawn to with increasing intensity. "Sometimes people just need to understand each other better."
I'm aware of him before I see him. It’s an electric current that sizzles between us. I know I could find him in a crowd of a thousand people with my eyes closed.
I glance toward the doorway and there he is, leaning against the frame, arms crossed, watching us with an expression I can't quite read. In the dim light of Leo's bedside lamp, his features are softer somehow, more human.
There's something in his face as he watches me read to his son. There’s the usual protectiveness, but something else.
An emotion so raw and unguarded that it makes my heart skip a beat. This is what he's been missing, I realize. Not just someone to care for Leo, but someone to love him. The distinction feels important, though I'm not sure why.
