Page 16 of Captain Santiago and the Sky Dome Waitress
The woman’s face turned red. “You’re calling me aliar?”
Lucie suspected that the people lined up outside the restaurant had heard that. She stared at the woman, at a loss for what to say. The womanhadordered house blend. Virtually no one ordered haricot blend. It was their least popular blend and Lucie would have been surprised by the order and would have remembered it.
But for some reason the woman wanted to…whatdidshe want?
Lucie held up her hands, signaling peace. “Would you like another carafe? I can get a haricot blend brewing. It will only take a few –”
The woman roared and swung the carafe across the table, clearing it of everything in one massive sweep. The barely touched breakfast platter, the plate with fresh toast, the bowl with jams, the little pitcher with sticky syrup, the milk, the sugar, a butter knife, the eating knife, the fork, dirty teaspoons, salt and pepper…all went flying, most of it directly at Lucie.
Lucie shrieked and threw up her arms, staggering back out of the way of the heaviest of the missiles. Her back rammed up against the wall and she dropped to the floor, curling in on herself.
The woman leapt onto her seat, and spread her arms. “What sort of shit hole is this?” she demanded. “You fuck up the order, then tell me I’m lying? How much else are you covering up?” She leaned down and picked up a piece of bacon from the plate of the customer on the table next to her. The customer had vacated the table and was over in the corner, his napkin tucked into his shirt, his eyes wide.
“This…what is this? Is it even meat?” The woman sniffed it and made a gagging sound. She tossed the bacon onto another table, making the customers at that table cringe and moan and lurch to their feet and hurry out of reach.
“It’s all shit.Allof it!” the woman cried. She stepped onto her empty table, then with one long-legged stride, over to the next, which scatteredthosecustomers. She began to kick and shove everything on the table onto the floor.
Lucie raised her arm enough to look around the room. Who would stop this…thisinsanewoman?
Olivette was peering through the service slot, her hand on her mouth. Her eyes glittered. Was she crying?
Everyone else hung back, terror or amazement on their faces. Even some amusement.
At the far corner of the wall, where it turned to create the pocket where Elijah Santiago preferred to sit, the man himself jumped up onto the half-wall that divided this section of the room, allowing tables to be crowded right up next to each other on each side of the wall. He walked along the narrow flat top of the wall, strolling like he would through the main downtown plaza.
Lucie couldn’t figure out what he was doing. Her thoughts, usually clear and logical, were scattered, chattering fragments that she couldn’t string together to make sense.
All she could do was watch and shiver.
The tall woman screamed insults and stomped on the food on the table, kicking bits of egg and pancakes onto the floor, or at the customers who were too close. They shrank away with cries of horror and fear, as if she had been firing a rattler at them.
The more sensible customers were streaming out the doors, directly behind the wall that Lucie was curled up against. She couldn’t move, even though she desperately wanted to be one of the sensible ones leaving the restaurant.
Elijah Santiago moved closer to the woman, who was jumping now from table to table, landing heavily with both boots. The tables creaked each time she jumped, but she seemedto be more delighted by the small cascades of food and china she sent flying out across the carpet each time she landed.
And with every breath, she screamed insults about the Sky Dome. About its food, the coffee, the lack of service, the lies management told, how no one could trust what they ate here, and more.
Lucie moaned. She couldn’t seem to control the shivering that wracked her. She couldn’t move at all.
“Hey!” Santiago yelled.
The woman turned. “Someone who believes me! A convert!”
“Not on your nelly,” Santiago replied. He paused along the wall, about four meters from where she bounced upon a creaking table.
By the wild look in the woman’s eyes, her adrenaline was driving her, making her ready for anything. She was in fight mode.
“Are you going to get down off the table and shut up, or do I have to make you?” Santiago said.
She threw her head back and bellowed laughter.
Santiago pushed off the wall and flew through the air, his hands out. He slammed into the woman’s mid-section, driving her backwards and down toward the floor.
They both hit heavily. Lucie watched the woman’s head slam into the carpet. Santiago landed on top of her, not lightly. Lucie heard the woman’s breath punch out in a wheezing “hoof!” sound.
Her head had to be spinning, and she was winded, but still the woman’s mouth worked, whispering more insults, more claims about the Sky Dome and its lack of quality.
But she was contained, and everyone whirled around the two of them. They bent to help Santiago up and to keep the woman on her back.
