Page 90 of Meant to Be
She smiled, hoping against hope his words were a declaration of something beyond an affair.
He stepped back and put her dress back in place. “I’ll see you at lunch.”
It took a few minutes for Sydney to get the fog out of her brain. Once she did, she started her day.
Her 11:40 appointment cancelled, so Sydney went to her office. Was she really going to make love to Mitch on her desk? Her cheeks heated at the idea. She knew the nurses and staff left for lunch, while the office closed for the hour. The other doctors usually did rounds. Her heart rate sped up. The old Sydney would never have had sex anywhere but in bed, and certainly not away from home. The only exception had been an interlude in a hot tub with Mitch during college. The idea of it thrilled her, even as it made her nervous. Mitch was whittling away all her inhibitions.
She decided to freshen up for his visit, pulling her purse from the bottom drawer of her desk. She opened it, looking for her compact, when she saw her mail. Thoughts of Mitch had distracted her, and she’d forgotten it. The bills could wait, so she pushed them aside. She looked at the manila envelope, recognizing the perfect handwriting of her mother. A shiver of anticipation ran up her spine. The five letters she sent were bound with a rubber band, organized by postmark, first to last. Sydney’s organizational skills clearly came from her mother. The first two envelopes had the most heft. By the last envelope, the letters were light, as if they were filled with only a single piece of paper.
She opened the first envelope, grateful that, while her mother had hidden them, she hadn’t read them. She unfolded the paper and a hard object fell out. Her engagement ring. Her breath hitched. It was a basic gold band with a single, small diamond. But the love it had represented was huge. When Mitch proposed, it had been the happiest day of her life. A few months later, it was over.
She remembered when Mitch told her if she couldn’t marry him when he got back from boot camp, then it was over. Stunned and angry, she’d given him the ring. She remembered being in a fog when she’d done it and regretting it to the point that she’d nearly chased his plane down the runway to get it back.
She slipped it on to test it. It was a little tighter but still fit. Tears filled her eyes as she looked at the diamond once again sitting where it should have been for the last ten years. Not wanting to be caught with it on, she removed it and put it back in the envelope. Then she opened the letter.
Sydney,
I’ve been trying to contact you, but my calls and e-mails aren’t going through. I know you’re mad, and you have every right to be. I was an idiot. I was feeling bad about being away from you and then you said you wanted to postpone the wedding, and I got angry and hurt. I said things I didn’t mean. I’m sorry. I wish I were there to make it up to you. I will make it up to you when I get back.
I don’t want to wait years to get married, but if you want to postpone the wedding for a little while, I’ll go along with it. Please put the ring back on and say you’ll marry me.
- Love, Mitch
Sydney closed her eyes. She’d known the letters would say something like this, but to see the words in his handwriting made her heart ache.
She opened the second letter dated three weeks after the first.
Syd,
Did you get my last letter? Are you angry and ignoring me? Have you given up on me? Please say you forgive me. I love you. I always will.
The letter wenton to describe his day and all the stuff he’d have shared if they hadn’t broken up. But, at the end, he apologized again and asked for her forgiveness.
She sat back, guilt filling her, even though it wasn’t her fault that she hadn’t responded. She was afraid to read the remaining letters, knowing that as they went on, his words would become angrier.
There was a tap on her door.
“Lunch is here.” Mitch poked his head in with a seductive grin and twinkle in his eye.
She looked at him, full of remorse for hurting him and relief that he had given her a second chance. She wiped at stray tears.
His head cocked to the side as he moved into her office. “You okay?” He looked at the letters on her desk as he entered. He was reaching out for her but stopped short. He picked up the first letter. His gaze shot to hers. In that instant, the wall was up. Anger and resentment radiated from him.
“You told me you didn’t get these.” He shook the letter at her. “You lied.”
“No—”
He tossed the letter on her desk and turned away.
“Mitch—” Panic shot through her heart.
He swung around. “To think I thought we might have a future after all.”
His words both embraced and slapped her. She hadn’t been wrong about what she’d seen in his eyes and felt in his touch. But just as he was telling her there could be more, he was taking it away.
“I can explain.”
“How you lied? How you made this all my fault when the entire time it was yours?”
