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you can’t deny it

and that’s one question down for you. fyi

Daddy

I’m still making up my mind about it

Nathan

I’m starting to feel like my talents aren’t appreciated around here

fucking yourself on a dildo like that is hard work

requires tons of practice, you know

Daddy

Maybe I’ll kiss all that hurt better tomorrow

Nathan sighed, dropped his phone before he started getting ready for bed. He wasn’t tired and doubted he could fall asleep even if he tried really hard, but he could at the very least do some reading.

With all the deadlines his boss had been pressuring him about all week, and texting Ken, wondering what he was thinking about the homemade pornographic video, Nathan had barely had time to himself.

Turning on his e-reader, he let himself relax as the latest book he’d been reading loaded up. It was the latest release by his favorite author, a dark paranormal romance about a mob boss and the brat he tamed with dubious methods.

Nathan could imagine what Ken would think about it—he would hate the brat outright—but that wasn’t enough to deter him from getting lost in the pages.

* * *

Unable to focus on the words anymore, his eyelids too heavy to keep reading, Nathan turned and twisted in the blankets for what felt like hours. Sleep just wasn’t in his cards for the night, he thought.

The idea that he’d be seeing Ken for lunch, that he’d be spending time with him, touching him too—even if it was for a completely innocent handshake or a casual brush of his hands as they both reached for a cheesy nacho…

Nathan shivered.

It was too overwhelming, knowing his…fantasy of a man…was going to be right there at his fingertips.

What if things didn’t work out? What if it was awkward and stilted, and once the bond that had somehow formed when Nathan had felt vulnerable and hurt faded, they realized there was no chemistry, no… nothing?

And what if it worked out? What if they saw each other, and the spark he already felt only grew and grew? What if it became something serious, if Ken proved to be the Dominant energy that Nathan craved in his life and hadn’t managed to find yet?

Perhaps meeting was a bad idea.

He shook his head, the thought preposterous.

Besides, he knew it was for the best. The result would be more devastating if they found out they weren’t compatible after talking for months on end.

Nathan wouldn’t survive it.

He just had to see if he could survive this, and an annoying voice at the back of his head was on a mission to make him believe he wouldn’t.

Nathan

I don’t know if I want you to be awake or not

The text might come off as needy or bother Ken. Nathan didn’t know.

But maybe his future Daddy—if only in his dreams—was awake, and shared his anxiety about tomorrow, and knew what to do about it before Nathan completely lost it. Or before he stayed all night awake, and became the worst company tomorrow, ruining their chances before anything could happen.