Page 10 of Noah
“Who says I was offering myself to you? Maybe it was just hot. Maybe I always sleep naked.”
“Good point. Maybe you do,” he says easily, and then he rinses out his coffee mug, puts it on the drying rack, and disappears down the hallway to start his day.
Why is it such a relief for Jensen to concede the ridiculous point and let Noah have that little bit of dignity?
He watches his new flatmate walk away and has the unfortunate realization that his gorgeous flatmate looks just as good walking away as he did coming closer on the street. Even though now he’s just in comfy gray sweatpants and a thin t-shirt.
Good god. After everything Noah has just been through, surely it would be utterly ridiculous to fantasize about Jensen.
Surely he isn’t so insanely needy and horny that he’s eyeing up Jensen already.
Just because he’s single, rich, gorgeous, sensitive, and kind…just because there’s enough calm control to make his inner submissive perk up and want to please.
No, it would be a terrible, unwise stupid thing to do. And Noah is determined to start making good decisions.
Hopefully, he can start doing that.
Maybe now.
5
Noah knocks on Jensen’s door an hour later. Jensen’s dressed in a blue cashmere sweater that brings out his eyes and affects Noah like a punch to the gut.
But in a good way.
“Hey. Uh…nice sweater. I was thinking about going out to do a little shopping for my new room. If I got a throw pillow or blanket for the apartment would that be okay?”
“Of course, it would. This is your home now too.”
“Is there anything you don’t like? Colors or patterns?” He’d like to get something Jensen loves. Some small way to show his gratitude for the man’s kindness and generosity.
Jensen leans against the door, head tilted to the side as he thinks about the question. Noah’s phone dings, yet another message from his former master. Noah can’t stop himself from glancing at it, even though Johann is currently in a mood to be cruel, each text worse than the last.
His vision blurs as he takes in the words. He should be numb to it by now.
“Oh my God,” Jensen murmurs, apparently able to read the message upside down. “He can’t speak to you that way,” he practically growls.
“Sorry. I wish you hadn’t seen that,” he says, the words ‘sloppy’ and ‘ungrateful’ repeating over and over in his mind.
“Don’t apologize for his actions,” he says firmly.
He knows Jensen is right, but he can’t help it. Which means he says nothing.
“I don’t think you need to be looking at every message. Wouldn’t it be better if you just blocked him? Or told him not to contact you anymore?”
“I don’t think—I can’t do that. Not yet. Maybe not ever. And he’s not wrong. I did leave him, I am breaking the deal of our arrangement, and even if I’m not gonna go back to him, maybe I deserve this at least? To hear how I’ve hurt and disappointed him? This is like penance.”
“No. Relationships are not arrangements. You’ve now ended it, and he needs to respect that and leave you alone. You don’t owe penance to an abuser.”
Noah shrugs. He isn’t sure what relationships are anymore.
Noah’s phone dings again.
Jensen glares murderously at it. “Maybe I should talk to him?“
Noah laughs in shock. “Ha. No. Absolutely not.” Just from the tone of his voice, he thinks there wouldn’t be much talking so much as yelling and swearing and telling Johann to go fuck himself.
Jensen takes a deep breath in through his nose and exhales slowly. “Fine. How about you and I go out and do a little bit of shopping together? We can do it the old-fashioned way. Leave our phones here so we’re not distracted.”
