Page 25 of Noah
He has a long time to cry for.
Jensen holds him close, manages to get the bedspread pulled over them both, and then drags a pillow under their heads, and they’re like two question marks facing each other, Jensen waiting for Noah to come back to him.
“Daddy?” He whispers like he’s been saying it all his life and it’s his right.
“You’re alright, sweetheart. My little prince. Are you ready for dinner?”
“Yes, please.”
He puts Noah in his bathrobe and then leads him out to the kitchen, thinks about having him sit at the table to eat dinner, but there’s something so fragile and needy in his demeanor that Jensen doesn’t want him sitting even two feet away. His boy needs to be kept close and held.
And so they eat dinner on the couch, Noah snuggled into his side, and Jensen alternating bites between the two of them until they’re both full. The two new throw blankets get draped over them and Jensen turns on the TV, and winds up putting on The Little Mermaid when they take a bathroom break halfway through, he’s able to bring out the dolphin.
Noah stares at it for a long moment and then holds out both arms, not saying anything until he’s clutching it to his chest.
“Thank you, daddy,” he says, just before the movie starts again. He gives Noah a kiss on the forehead, readjusts their blankets and they finish watching the movie. And maybe this is what it’s like for a normal daddy/boy relationship.
Perhaps all weekends wind up being like this, where he has someone to take care of, someone to hold and cherish and focus on. He knows it’s good for Noah but he hadn’t thought it would be so good for him, too.
What he’d get out of it had paled in contrast. Been conjecture. But Jensen can’t remember the last time he was so content and certain that he was where he needed to be and doing the most good. By taking care of his boy.
Of course.
It’s a revelation.
As soon as the credits roll, he gets Noah ready for bed, tucks him in with his dolphin, and turns out all but the bedside lamp. Noah breathes deep and easy, utterly exhausted from the emotion of the last few days, and Jensen gets himself ready for bed, too.
It’s a good thing Noah is asleep or he’d likely find Jensen’s scrutiny creepy. But he can’t stop himself from looking, gaze endlessly running over the sheer perfection of Noah’s features and form.
He’s so soft and good. So sweet.
And after everything he’s been through, somehow he’s still so trusting. It makes Jensen feel even more protective.
This is his boy to take care of.
Yes, the suggestion to be daddy/boy had been for a night, but already he knows that isn’t going to be enough. This boy is meant to be his.
There is no way he’s letting Noah go.
* * *
The words “Can I?”wake Jensen in the night.
He’s hard, and that registers a moment after the question. And the reason for his late-night arousal is Noah, his nose and lips pressed against Jensen’s groin, nuzzling him, apparently eager to return the favor now that he’s had some rest.
“That depends. Are you going to be my boy in the morning?” he asks, voice rough with sleep.
Noah stills, the tension palpable. “If you want.”
“I do want that. Very much.”
He can just make out Noah turning to look at him through the dark. “You bought me a dolphin.”
“I did. I thought it suited you. A good first present for my boy.”
“And then you fed me dinner and watched a movie with me.”
“I did.”
