Page 28 of Entwined Hearts
Pure magic, that’s what it would’ve been. But I stopped while I was ahead, not wanting to make an already bad day a shitty one.
Moments later, Colt rolled up in his squad car, cranking that fucking Nelly song. He knocked his sunglasses down his nose, peering at me over the dark lenses with a smug grin. He must’ve seen how over it I was, because he turned the music down quickly. “You look like hell.”
“And you look like one of those cheap porno actors who’s impersonating a cop,” I said as I got into the car with a sigh.
He let out an amused huff. “How’d it go?”
“Fine,” I replied, my voice hollow. I stared out the window, watching the streets of Wild Creek pass as we rode out to the house. “Only have to wear the sling eighteen hours now instead of all day. Yippee.”
“That’s good,” he said, forcing cheerfulness into his voice.
I grunted. We drove the rest of the way in silence, which was why I asked Colt to get me instead of Beau. Beau would’ve pushed, given me some kind of motivational speech, or something equally annoying. Colt knew when to offer advice and when to keep his mouth shut. And now was one of those times I needed to sit in my feelings and try to figure out what the hell they were beyond just plain bad.
Colt dropped me off at the house with plans to get dinner later, and I trudged up to my room, flopping down on the bed, exhausted. Not just physically, but mentally, too. I looked around at all the trophies, medals, and buckles I’d won over the years on display, my heart heavy.
My life’s work was in this room since it was my landing spot between stints on the road. Everything I’d ever worked for since the age of twelve, and now it could all be crumbling down. I didn’t doubt that I’d get back on a bull someday. I knew I would, but I didn’t know if it’d be professionally. PBR didn’t wait for you to heal, and fans wouldn’t either. They’d move on to the next big thing, the money generator. I hated it. It took the joy out of riding. It was more than money for me, and for a lot of other guys, too.
I ran a hand through my hair and pulled out my phone. Ripping off the band-aid, I sent a text to Austin with an update.
Me:Just had a PT assessment. Won’t be back for at least 3 months.
Austin:Damn. That’s longer than we hoped. Let me know when we can get you back in the arena and we’ll line something up.
That was it.No “How are you feeling?” No “Hang in there, we’re rooting for you.” Not even a stupid thumbs-up emoji. Just straight business. It made me feel like a commodity instead of a person with value. But maybe that was all I was to them.
My chest tightened. They were already moving on. Yet another precious thing I had was slipping through my fingers like sand. I ripped the sling off, tossing it to the floor with a grunt. “Goddamnit,” I rasped, breathing hard, my head in my hands.
What was wrong with me? Why couldn’t I hold on to anything? First my parents, then Sav, and now this? Did I love things too hard? Suffocate them? Had that been why everything got ruined?
I fell back on my bed, staring at the ceiling. I looked over at my nightstand, at the picture of Beau, Colt, Anna, and me from when we were teenagers. I’d held onto them, held on so tight they became my family. They were the only things I knew with certainty I’d never lose, no matter how hard I clung on.
My eyes fell to the drawer, and I opened it slowly, pulling out the framed picture I kept face down in the back. My throat grew tight as Savannah’s face came into view. She was supposed to have been something I’d never lose either, but it was just proof that you never knew how long something would last.
I remembered taking the picture; we were two towns over at a little rundown diner on our first date. Her lips were wrapped around the straw of her cookies and cream milkshake, her dark eyes wide and loving, radiating joy.
She had just told me she wanted to be with me, and I knew in that moment I loved her. Knew I’d do anything to keep her.
I dug around in the drawer until my hand ran over a box, and I pulled it out, the lid creaking with age as I opened it. A rush of air left me like a deflating balloon as I stared down at the ring. The diamond, tiny as it was, sparkled in the light. It wasn’t evenhalf a carat, but I’d saved for it for months. The band was simple, thin, and gold. It wasn’t anything special, not even a morsel of the kind of ring my Sav deserved.
But it looked meant to be when I slid it onto her finger eleven years ago.
And it was the worst pain I’d ever experienced when she gave it back an hour later.
I knew from the look on her face that something had been wrong, that she had been lost in her head so deep even I couldn’t pull her out of it.
“Say something,” I said, my voice too quiet. I didn’t want her to know I was freaking out, but she just kept staring at the ring. Staring at it like it was a weight dragging her down.
“I don’t know what to say,” she whispered.
“Anything, angel, just talk to me.” I brushed her hair back, desperate to touch her, to feel connected to her in any way possible. “Let me in that cute head of yours.”
The corner of her mouth twitched with a barely there smile. “I love you, Wes,” she said, her voice shaky. “I love you more than I thought was possible.” She looked up at me with teary eyes, and my stomach dropped. “But I’m only eighteen. I’m leaving for school in two days.”
My chest tightened. “And I told you I want to come with you. There are ranches in California. I can get a job at one and ride while you go to school.”
Her chin quivered, and more tears than I could catch rolled down her cheeks. “I don’t want you to come with me.” The words were soft, broken, and devastating as they left her.
I blinked, my mind struggling to absorb them. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think, couldn’t feel anything, my body numb with shock. “W-What?” I never would’ve predicted her saying that.
