Page 30 of A Winter Redemption
“Yes. I did.” Jarne tried to think of what else to say. “I found some bark with a rather pleasing aroma. I’m not sure the name of the tree, but if the scent could be captured, it might make a nice perfume mixed with other scents.” He glanced at his notebook. “There are so many interesting floras in these mountains. Did you never consider sourcing material up here?”
Jarne raised his gaze to his brother’s face. Aryn had turned away, jaw tense.
“Aryn?”
“I don’t care about perfume,” Aryn said, voice hard like flint. “I do not care about perfume. Or the family. Or Greweth Perfumeries.”
“Oh,” Jarne said.
“And I don’t care about Bordertown. And I don’t care that I wasn’t a good perfume alchemist.” Aryn’s voice rose. “I hated it back there. I was miserable. So you can just leave me alone and stop pushing your perfumes on me!”
“I’m sorry,” Jarne said, taken aback. “I had not intended to push.”
Aryn opened his mouth. He closed it. He shoved his hands into his pockets. “That’s the first time you’ve ever said sorry to me.”
“No, it’s not.” Jarne frowned. “I said it the other day when we talked about Sasha.”
Aryn laughed harshly. “No, you didn’t. You just explained why it wasn’t your fault.”
Was that true? Jarne couldn’t remember. “Well, I am sorry. I never intended to steal Sasha from you.”
Aryn studied him. The moments stretched out. “All right,” Aryn said.
Silence followed. Jarne realised that Ketho and Sero no longer spoke either. They seemed to be watching the two of them.
Jarne took a deep breath and straightened his spine, holding the notebook against his chest. “I should go to my room. Finish making my notes.” Without waiting for a response, Jarne walked through the store, down the hallway, and to his room. He heard Ketho’s murmured voice.
Jarne stood in the middle of his room. A moment later, he heard the door close behind him. A hand touched his shoulder.
“Are you all right?” Ketho asked.
“I’m fine.” Jarne placed his notebook on his desk and opened it to his notes. “I don’t think I realised how much Aryn hated his life in Bordertown.” He kept his voice level as he stared at the scrawled pencil marks, eyes unseeing. “Or how much he hates me.”
Ketho’s arms slid around his waist. “‘Hate’ is a strong word. But you did hurt him.” Ketho stroked his hair. A gesture Jarne had seen mothers do to their children when trying to comfort them.
Not his mother, of course. She didn’t go for those sorts of maternal affections.
He found it surprisingly soothing.
“You apologised, and that’s a start,” Ketho said. “Perhaps if you talked to him more. I know you said you probably won’t see much of him once you leave, but whilst you are here, it seems a wasted opportunity to not try to make amends.”
“I suppose.” Jarne inhaled. “But I’m not good at that. Not good at talking. Not good at reading others. I never minded before. I had work to do, and that always came first.” But now he couldn’t help but feel that ignoring the rest of his life and everyone in it had been a mistake.
“I feel like the only thing I understand anymore is perfume,” Jarne said. “I didn’t understand my husband. My mother. My entire family. And I don’t understand my brother.”
Part of him wanted to run back to Bordertown and lock himself in his workshop for the rest of his life, blocking everything and everyone out. Or maybe live in a hovel in the forest.
He let out a breath and let himself relax, just a little, against Ketho. At least he wasn’t entirely alone. And even though his time with Ketho was only temporary, he would value it before he returned to his solitary life focused only on work in Bordertown.
ChapterTwenty
The light through the windows slowly faded as Ketho and Jarne lay together after an afternoon of sex. The heavy grey curtains hung open, snow falling beyond. A fire crackled in the hearth.
“Have you had lots of sexual partners?” Jarne asked.
Ketho sat up. “Where did that question come from?”
“It’s just a question,” Jarne said. “I know you were with Sero. And I imagine I was not the first person you’d approached at that inn. I just wondered how many.”
