Page 75 of Under The Twilight Rainfall
I grasp his chin with gentle fingers and pull his mouth to mine. It’s a sweet kiss between tired lips, salty from dried tears, and when I lick at the seam, he parts readily, openly.
“I love you, Valen.”
I’m not good at saying it out loud, point blank. Showing and beating around the bush I can do, but I owe it to him to be open and honest about how I feel.
Valen hums happily, a sweet little purring sound.
“I love you,mahal ko. I’ll miss you.” He kisses each of my cheeks, my eyelids, my nose, and my lips again.
I hold him tight, afraid to let go. Afraid he’ll disappear and I’ll find out this was all some twisted dream. That he can’t possibly be mine. I can’t possibly have something as good as him. Can’t possibly be good enough.
His fingers twist in my hair, the sharp sting making me drop my head back, but there’s no anger or frustration on Valen’s face. Just love and affection and the desire to give me what I need.
“You’ll always be my heart,” he says, splaying his hand across my chest, eyes reaching into my soul and plucking at every string. “And I’ll always be your home.”
Home.
The one thing I’ve always wanted but felt that I could never have. What I thought would always be ripped from my fingers the moment I was comfortable enough to stay.
The thing that—even though I’ll be flying thousands of miles away—I’m doing for him. Doing for myself.
Staying with Valen. Coming back to him. Making him my anchor in the storm of my life.
I’m terrified, but I’m willing to try.
Because every fiber of my being wants to be with him, wants to make a home and a life with him.
I want to be his forever and for him to be mine.
We hold each other in silence for a while, and it’s hours later of talking and kissing and caressing that I get the courage to ask him the question that’s been burning a hole in my mind since the day I left all those years ago.
“Would you have let them adopt me? Your parents? Back then? Even though you were in love with me?”
Valen rolls to his side, propped up on one elbow, and captures my jaw in his free hand. His eyes are soft. So soft and shining with the passion only found in a man deeply, irrevocably in love.
“Of course. Don’t you get it, Dex?” He smiles sweet, tasting my mouth, which must be anything but.
“You’re my family,” he whispers with our lips still touching. “You’ve always been my family. If I had to push my love aside so you could have what you needed—so you could be happy—I would have done it in a heartbeat.”
And just like that, I know I’ve found it.
My person.
My home.
I’ll never have a heart that doesn’t beat for Valen Olaño,my family.
Five Years Later
Seventeen weeks is how long Dex has been gone this time. Usually it’s nothing. Usually he stops in for a quick visit or I join him for a week or two before we separate again.
Usually.Usually I’m not elbows deep in clinical duties and late-night studies. But I am. And it’s been seventeen weeks since I’ve seen Dex beyond my computer screen.
Ever since I started nursing school, it’s been harder for us to find the free time to be together where one of us isn’t exhausted. Dex has tried taking breaks—staying with me for more than a week or two—and even though his need to be on the move has lessened over the years, he still gets a little antsy when things become too domestic.
And with him becoming a bigger name in the cam world—mostly behind the lens—he stays on the move fulfilling contracts that he signs way too flippantly.
But I love him, and it’s not like we’re new to the long distance thing.
