Page 28 of Phantom Faceoff
When Julian pouts out his lip again, Zander kisses him. “How about you hop in the shower here, and I’ll make you both up a place to sleep on the couch?”
I open my mouth to protest, but our close proximity gives Zander the bright idea to sling his free arm aroundmywaist and close our circle.
“No funny business. The others will likely crash, too.”
I want to argue, but Jules is already bearing his weight on me, so I suck up my pride and give in.
“Fine. But I’m not responsible for any damage done if someone looks at him wrong.”
Zander laughs, and I’m too fucking aware that he hasn’t let me go.
It’s well into the night by time the house settles down. Most have scurried off to bedrooms, a few out the door, but Julian and I are downstairs on the couch.
More accurately, Julian is bundled on the couch, and I’m settled on the floor in front of it. He tried to argue that we could share, but Julian is an active sleeper, and I’ve learned to keep a safe distance.
Jules was far from sober enough to wash himself up without turning the bathroom into a slip ’n slide, so we showered together and are both stuffed into clothes from the various house inhabitants.
Julian was able to borrow a t-shirt and pair of shorts from Micky while I got tossed a hoodie and sweats from Zander.
“It’s not fair,” Julian grumbles, pressing his face into one of the couch cushions.
“If you had asked, I’m sure Zander would have loaned you something, too.”
He sticks his tongue out, and I fight back a laugh.
“Mean, Daddy,” he whispers, and I wonder how much of his attitude is the alcohol and how much is the regression.
“Get some sleep, love.”
His bright copper locks fly about as he rubs his face into the fabric. “Can’t.”
“Why not?”
He curls tightly in on himself, bright eyes piercing me in the darkness.
“Jules.” I roll onto my side, matching his stare. “Honesty time.”
In the pocket of silence that follows, Jules drops his hand down, and I catch it in my own.
“I don’t want to be alone.” The words are whispered and wet, though I can’t see the tears in the dark.
“I’m right here.”
The moment brings me back to nights in the group home when I’d camp in front of Julian’s bed while he slept. Deter some of the nastier boys from giving him trouble.
“Can I lay with you?”
Another moment where I’d wake up half propped on the mattress to green eyes watching me, curled beside me.
Sleeping together—in the most platonic sense—has been reserved for those nights when the past catches up to us faster than we can dream it away.
Resigning myself to being even more sore than I was already going to be, I open up my other arm and nearly choke on the laughter as he scrambles down into my hold.
Julian is still clenching my hand even as he buries his face in my shoulder and scrunching up the hoodie in his fists.
A pang of sadness hits me. “If you want, I’m sure Hale would let you sleep with him.”
The head shake is instant. “I want you, Daddy.”
