Page 20 of Stronger Than Fate
“We agree that you've said many things out of line, but we've already discussed that, let's leave it at that.”
“Then why won't you accept my dinner invitation? Are you seeing someone?” he asked, paying close attention to my response.
For a few moments we just stared into each other's eyes. Me not knowing whether to answer his question and him with visible anxiety to know my response.
“Not at the moment,” I finally said. “Why do you want to invite me to dinner? If it's to apologize, I already told you it's forgotten,” I pointed out, because I was clear that he was a manwho could have any woman and I imagined him dating women with more age and experience than me.
“Because I want to get to know you,” he stated with confidence.
“Let's speak clearly, what are you looking for?” I asked, without beating around the bush, wanting to know once and for all what this man intended.
“Do you want me to be direct?”
“I want you to be honest.”
“It's clear that there's a strong attraction between us,” he stated, and observed me, but I remained still without moving a muscle, neither denying nor confirming. “I'm also aware that I'm quite a bit older than you, I'm thirteen years older and the most sensible thing would be for me to stay away from you, but that's the problem, I can't do it. I assure you I've tried, but you have me thinking about you all day and thinking about how good we would be together. Since I met you, all I think about is having you,” he finished, and looked at me with something like apprehension, I assumed out of fear that his words might have offended me.
I looked at him not knowing what to say. Did this man really not stop thinking about me? The problem was that he probably couldn't imagine that I had no experience with sex and, most likely, when he found out, he would run away terrified because he would be looking for the exact opposite.
“You told me to be honest,” he clarified, seeing that I remained silent. “Can you say something?”
“I'm going to be honest and direct too.”
“Please,” he said, encouraging me to speak.
“What you want is to sleep with me,” I stated.
“Among other things, but what's wrong with that?”
“It depends on what you're proposing. I don't usually have partners just for sex,” I said with great conviction, omitting to say that I hadn't actually had sex at all.
“And I don't usually have girlfriends, but we can make an agreement.”
“Make an agreement?” I asked, astonished. “Would you have me sign an agreement?”
Henry smiled and, once again I was dazzled by his beauty. It was clear that he had me hypnotized and I desired him very much, but could I risk it?
“No; not at all. It's enough that we agree and have things clear between us. I've always been a very independent man. I love going about without having to account to anyone. Having to explain what I do or don't do seems suffocating to me. For that reason I haven't had girlfriends nor do I want them, but if you accept my proposition I'm willing to date only you. I have a feeling we'll give each other so much pleasure that we won't need to be with other people.”
And with what he had said I wasn't “in agreement.” With the experience that man would have, I wouldn't be up to his level by any means. He would have to initiate me, teach me, and I didn't think that was what he was looking for. From what he had said, he wasn't even content with dating just one woman, so he would be even less content being with a girl with no experience. While my head was racing, he watched me expectantly.
“I think I'll pass, champion,” I finally said, preferring to miss out on that experience rather than feeling rejected and humiliated.
“What? Why?” he asked, confused, it was clear that he was never rejected and I think he had taken it as an insult.
“I can't tell you.”
“Why not?”
“I already told you, I can't tell you.”
“Are you in love with someone? Are you gay?”
“No and no. Can't you just accept what I say? Don't you know how to take rejection?”
He observed me carefully. It seemed like his brain was racing at full speed thinking about something, and this time I wasn't wrong because his new proposal came immediately.
“Let's do something, let's see if we have a good time and then you can decide whatever you want.”
