Page 74 of May I Have the Pleasure

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Second, for the sake of society, I believe they both, each of them, have a solemn duty to protect the rest of society from the other. They are a menace to our entire social order.

(Darcy looks back and forth between Elizabeth and Catherine)

(Fitzwilliam looks at Darcy, and then at Catherine)

(Elizabeth stares at Darcy)

(Catherine stamps her walking stick on the floor twice, very hard)

CATHERINE

DARCY! You must see to this debacle. I will hold you responsible for obtaining a licence. You must have this pair married within the week for the sake of society!

There is no time to lose! Do what you need to do! Get the so-called gentleman to make a less abominable proposal.

If that does not do the trick, get him tap-hackled or butt him in the head with Fitzwilliam’s rifle—but get him standing in front of a parson within the week. It is essential.

(Darcy stares at his aunt)

CATHERINE

Well, Darcy! Will you see to it?

DARCY

I will.

(Darcy turns to Elizabeth and smiles sheepishly)

DARCY

Miss Bennet, do you concur with my aunt’s recommendation?

(Elizabeth looks carefully at Darcy, and then gives him a brilliant smile)

ELIZABETH

I do.

~~~~ CURTAIN ~~~~

The Wedding Afternoon

[Dialogue Only]

Ever wonder what happened during the ever-important interval between the wedding breakfast and the wedding night? Let's find out!

This is a dialogue-only story, so ALL you get is words and you must work out the expressions and actions based entirely on what’s said—almost the exact opposite of epistolary. It's an admittedly unusual style, but I hope you’ll like it.

Rosings, January 1812,

1 Month after Netherfield Ball

“Your husband is dead, Mrs Collins!”

“DEAD?”

“Yes ma’am”

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