Page 22 of May I Have the Pleasure
“Hear, hear,” Mr Collins said, and once again quit while he was ahead.
Darcy had to grin at the thought of how his aunt would react when she learned his nephew knew the parson’s wife better than his own cousin (and supposed intended), but he kept that thought to himself.
Jane surprised everyone by saying, “That is two of three, Mr Darcy.”
He looked a bit startled, but glanced at Elizabeth, who gently added, “You must admit that, despite the brevity of our acquaintance, we have been subjected to the most intensematchmaking effort in history. Also, your intentions these six weeks have been only slightly less subtle than Mr Collins’s, once we knew the story. I would be comfortable hearing your thoughts.”
He was staring at her intently, wondering if there wasanypart of his courtship that would proceed in the ordinary way.
“My thoughts are those that should be spoken in private.”
“So are your thoughts about the other two couples… unless, of course, you wish to say we arenota nascent couple.”
“CERTAINLY NOT!” he said with a squeak in his voice, which made her laugh nervously herself. Both knew this was certainly not the way a courtship was supposed to proceed.
She gave him a pensive smile. “Have you a rule-of-six for us?”
He looked at her intently while the rest held their collective breaths.
“I have two… or possibly three.”
“Do tell,” she replied in a whisper.
“The first is that, much to my surprise, and as odd as it sounds for a normally cautious man—I believe I fell in love with you in six minutes.”
She gasped, but made no move to refute him, though her hand beneath the table squeezed his.
That providedsufficient encouragementfor him to continue. “Being a somewhat cautious man, I am amazed to find that we were subjected to six months’ worth of acquaintance in six hours.”
That did raise a gasp around the table, but nobody refuted it. Everyone knew that propriety usually prevented couples from saying much of anything of significance in the first months of their acquaintance, and they probably knew as much about each other as Jane and Bingley.
Elizabeth looked at him carefully for some time before replying, “I suppose the question is if it will take six weeks for you to decide whether to declare or desist.”
“That presupposes that the decision is mine to make,” he replied cautiously.
“You assert you fell in love in six minutes. We had not even left the receiving line by then. You started from nothing at the ball, while I had been reading about you for six weeks. I have the advantage of six weeks on you, and I think I know my own mind at least as well as Mary.”
Darcy chuckled and squeezed her hand under the table.
“Ah, that analysis might be true, except for one thing.”
“Which is?”
“The six minutes were not in the receiving line! They occurred at the assembly. It just took six weeks, and a lot of assistance from our friends and neighbours for this lunkhead to know his own heart. I think it was decided in the six seconds once I finally saw you and spoke to you. Everything just felt right, and the subsequent six minutes, hours, years, decades will not change my heart. It is quite the stubborn creature.”
Elizabeth’s face lit up with a smile that put Jane’s to shame, and the table breathlessly awaited her answer to the oddest proposal in history.
“Papa, I hope you are at your leisure today. I believe you will be busy this afternoon.”
Mr Bennet laughed heartily.
“Come, come, Lizzy. You have been whingeing about my indolence for years, and far be it from me to deny you an ‘I told you so.’ I will gladly sacrifice the small bit of amusement that would ordinarily be my due by granting my consent and blessing thrice right here and now. Gentlemen, I suggest you acquire sufficient privacy and get on with it. Come to me when you have contracts to sign.”
With that, Mr Bennet abruptly stood, helped his wife up, glared at Kitty and Lydia to depart, and the room was vacated, leaving the three couples to do as they might.
It did not take long, and since nothing else had gone as usual, three questions were asked, answered, and celebrated with brandy and sherry within six minutes, without even leaving the table.
The Not So Silent Life
