Page 29 of Eavesdroppers Never Hear
Elizabeth said, “I commend your prudence, sir. I am not the player Mary is, so a sensible man would prefer to not be thrashed a second day in a row.”
Darcy laughed, and Elizabeth liked the sound of it. Jane and Mary did as well, but that was of less importance. The two youngest Bennet daughters had lost interest in the dour dandy from Derbyshire before the introductions were complete, so they had no opinion. Mrs Bennet was shocked into silence by the outof character response, while Mr Bennet had no opinion about any mirth insufficient to breach the thick door of his library, since he had not even appeared to greet his guest.
With a bow, Darcy escorted Elizabeth to the backgammon table.
Jane gamely engaged Mrs Bennet in conversation while Mary joined in. Elizabeth assumed Mary thought she needed the practise in keeping her mother occupied, probably assuming Elizabeth’s days in the house were numbered.
The backgammon table was soon set up, and the first few moves were made in near silence until Elizabeth thought the rest of the denizens were sufficiently distant and occupied to give them a modicum of privacy.
“I must say you have thoroughly turned the courtship game on its head… as per your design, I am sure.”
He replied nervously. “What think you of the Modified Darcy Courtship System?”
“I am uncertain. I suppose I will not really know until we are a few moves in. I believe it has been extremely helpful in learning to understand you.”
“How so… aside from the obvious?”
She thought about her answer for some time while they made a few desultory moves on the board just for good form. She finally glanced around to ensure they were unobserved (more or less) and stared at him disconcertingly.
“You have made meresponsiblefor your happiness. I have never been responsible for anything important before,” she said seriously.
“The feeling is somewhere between heady, intimidating, and terrifying—which led me to think about how you must have felt when you were barely Jane’s age and had to take the responsibility for Pemberley. Of course, you are responsible for hundreds instead of just one… but still… I think the unexpectedacquisition of such burdens must have been disconcerting, regardless of how long you trained for it. Suddenly, your decisions had consequences beyond yourself. I have a new appreciation for that. It makes you something more than just another rich blunderbuss.”
He chuckled. “You are the first woman to call me a blunderbuss to my face. I like it and hope you will continue.”
“I shall endeavour to find more: lunkhead, chowderhead, bacon-brain, addlepate, and so forth.”
“Those are all just synonyms forman,” he said with a look of faux innocence.
Elizabeth laughed gaily, which did get the room’s attention, but since she felt no compulsion to make them privy, they rolled and made a few more moves… none of which made the slightest sense.
Darcy said, “I do appreciate how you are getting a better sketch of my character. I should, however, point out a couple of minor enhancements to your theory.”
“By all means. The Scientific Method demands refinement.”
“First, one could make a reasoned argument that you have been partially responsible for my happiness since Lucas Lodge… it is just explicit now.”
“Come, come, sir. Can you honestly assert that you would have courted me absent our precipitous exit from Netherfield. I find the idea… unlikely.”
He thought while they made a few more desultory moves. “I honestly cannot say. At the time I was entirely too caught up in my perceived self-importance and my mistaken belief that pursuing you would violate what I was taught. I hope I would have come to my senses sooner or later, but whether it would be closer to sooner than later is anybody’s guess.”
He sighed and looked around again. “To your point, had I left the county after Lucas Lodge, I doubt I would have pursuedyou. Had you stayed a few days at Netherfield to tend your sister, I probably would have. It is all speculative, but our coming together has a feeling of inevitability.”
“So—not really responsible at Lucas Lodge in the end?”
“No, I suppose not. We need a weaker word, but I cannot say what it is.”
She laughed. “There seems little point in debating it to death, unless we wish to use it as a convenient marker for our first lover’s tiff.”
She regretted the forwardness of the suggestion at once, but Darcy laughed softly to relieve her anxiety. “If this is not it, then I look forward to the occasion when it arrives.”
They played a few more moves before she said, “I believe you had a second… refinement to my statement?”
“Yes,” he said, then looked thoughtful before making certain they were unheard again. “It is not obvious, but you said I was responsible for the happiness of hundreds, while you are only responsible for one.”
“Yes, that seems obvious… although you could argue for two if you count me.”
“Therein lies the rub. You see, youareresponsible for the happiness of hundreds—or at least, you could be. Pemberley was a happy place when I was a child. The death of first my mother and then my father has made it less so. It is not a tomb, but it is not what it was. It may seem an unfair burden, but I need you to help me bring back that joy.”
