Page 16 of The Gossip War
As it turned out, my fondest dreams had come true, and all because of my formerly most disobliging, now most clever, daughter, Lizzy. My idea to send Jane to Netherfield on horseback paid off, but in the exact opposite way I expected. Engaged to the man who was her worst enemy twelve hours earlier was… was… well… let us just say I was all astonishment.
Of course, Jane showed she is cleverer than anybody gives her credit for by asserting nobody could dislike a handsome man so much if she did not like him just a little bit. Bless her naïve heart if believing that gives her comfort, but I know better. It is entirely possible, and quite easy, to hate a man for all the right reasons until the end of time. I was not about to quibble about their love story, but I thought it might be useful to speak a bit to Jane; especially if she would end up husband hunting in London, which compares to Meryton as a puddle to the ocean.
Elizabeth story was enchanting, and it was easy to see that passion would not be a particular problem for the couple. If I may use a crude analogy, Mr Darcy should have gone for a bucket of water instead of building the fire—if you know what I mean.
I had to admit to being enormously proud of my Lizzy. She had disparaged gossip all her life, and I will not open that debateright now. When the time was right, she recognised that she was in a gossip war, which naturally led her to understand that I was by far the best general for the process.
She did not understand all the nuances, as no twenty-year-old girl is likely to, but she had enough sense to call in the cavalry.
Once I declared we were at war, everyone turned to me for suggestions—which may well have been the first time since my marriage that happened. I enjoyed their obvious enthusiasm for each other and wondered if there was a way to rekindle a hundredth part of that after twenty-three years, but that was a question for another day. I had pulled quite enough ears for one day, thank you very much
First, we had to get the order of battle, so I took charge.
“Lizzy… Mr Darcy…”
Before I could get going, Mr Darcy said, “We shall be family. I should be pleased if you called me Fitzwilliam or William.”
Elizabeth smiled at him, but she was doing a lot of that lately.
“All right… Lizzy, William… This is a war, so let us treat it as one, agreed?”
“Of course, that is why we are here,” Lizzy volunteered while William nodded.
I took a deep breath and paused a moment to get my wits about me.
“We are like two armies facing off across a field of battle. Our army is far stronger, so you have better odds of winning the battle; but it is not so lopsided as to guarantee a bloodless victory in the war.”
“Agreed,” they said together while my husband and Jane looked on with great interest.
“As with any battle, there will be casualties on both sides. You have considerably more power in society than they do, but you also have vulnerabilities. At the very least, if they get nasty, theycan hurt your sister, and not to make too fine a point of it, you will have four more sisters within the month.”
The way William flinched drove home how vulnerable his sister was, but I did not delve into more details. We had to get to the big point.
“Here is the question we need to resolve tonight! You have two basic strategies. The first is what I shall call the easy way.
“You could meet in the library at one as planned and try to work out a settlement everyone can live with. They might hold their fire in exchange for not being entirely shunned.
“That still has some risk, as you are letting an army go back to rearm and fight another day, but could avoid the battle for the moment.”
My husband laughed a bit, and I was just about to give him what-for when he surprised me.
“That is very astute, my dear. I admit you have surprised me, and the fault must be mine. My hat is off to you. It is a brilliant analogy—and certainly bloody enough to keep our attention.”
I could have done without that last part, but I admit it may have been the nicest thing he had said to me in years. It may well have put me to the blush, but fortunately it was hidden by the poor lighting.
“Thank you, Thomas,” I said, then turned back to my main task.
William asked, “And the alternative.”
“Allow me to quote one of Lizzy’s dusty tomes:To hesitate is to yield. Let the blow be swift and let it end the matter.”
Elizabeth gulped, but both men just nodded.
Just to clarify, my husband said, “You mean to strike the first blow…”
William completed it, “… and make it definitive.”
“Correct! No quarter! No mercy! You must decide if you have the stomach to absolutely destroy them, but if you do, you cannot show weakness.”
