Page 22 of The Gossip War
Jane blushed but did not contradict her new brother. Everyone knows still waters run deep, so the incongruousness of the assertion set the Bingleys back on their heels, as Darcy intended.
To be honest, I was not certain Jane could be as hard as the job demanded when it came right down to it, but I had no qualms about believing it of my wife. Of course, I would do my part, as would the Darcys.
It fell to the sober Mr Hurst to ask, “What do you mean, binding agreement?”
I recognised the signs of surrender. There was a man built for surrender, and the others would lose their courage soon enough.
I reached into my valise and laid out a sheaf of papers we had worked feverishly with my brother-in-law to draw up that morning.
“The future Mrs Darcy invented this…mutual destruction pact. I took the liberty of bringing a notary as witness. This document lists the terms of the agreement, and then describes exactly what happened here last night, in terms that will have the ton twittering over it for months and papers running extra editions.
“None of us would escape unscathed if it were released, but you would get the worst of it.
“If released, now or later, it would have about the same effect as if you did your worst right now. It would harm us but destroy you.”
Bingley looked ready to pitch a fit, so I continued.
“We will all sign multiple copies and notarise them. Each group will keep a copy, with the explicit, legally enforceable agreement, but they will only be used if one side breaks the bargain.”
“What do you mean enforceable?” Bingley asked, finally showing his mettle, such as it was. His sister looked ready to scream, and might have, had he not put his boot on her foot with the obvious suggestion he could easily do worse.
“It is a contract, like any other. It names the conditions that would allow release of the document in some detail. If either party breaks the bargain, the other could sue them in the courts and probably win.”
Darcy added, “I will also make a substantial wager at Whites, as will Bingley and Hurst in my presence, that each side will keep it confidential. If it stays hidden, the bet will never be called. If it is released, it will cost the releasing party a great deal. The courts are one thing, but the betting book at Whites is quite another.”
“Retribution can be expensive,” Elizabeth added blithely, though I suspect she was just goading Miss Bingley.
Bingley was about to say something, but Darcy pre-empted him.
“Before you say anything, read the contract and the document so you know what you are about.”
Then he handed a sheet to each.
They whined about it for a while but eventually started reading.
Miss Bingley let out an ear-piercing scream about halfway through the first page. “What do you meananothercompromise attempt?”
Darcy looked like he would like to give her a set down, but Lizzy beat him to it.
“Miss Bingley, you tried to destroy the love of my life.”
That lady snorted and laughed aloud at that, while her brother tried to wave her to silence.
Elizabeth leaned forward and spoke emphatically, though without the anger one might expect. “Miss Bingley, I will give you this advice for free. He is, in fact, the love of my life. I love him more than you can imagine. You may believe that or not as you choose, but if you do not, then I pity you.”
“PITY?” she screeched, which left Darcy flinching at the idea of ever hearing such again.
Elizabeth continued blithely, “Yes, pity. You have every possible advantage. You are rich, and what the fashionable world considers beautiful and well educated.
“You could have any number of men, but if you pick him based on his purse, I think you will eventually rue the day.
“Thirty years hence, my loving husband will be by my side, having been there for three decades through thick and thin.
“If you carry on as you are, thirty years hence your husband will be moving on to his thirtieth mistress.”
Miss Bingley gasped at the sheer vulgarity of the statement (or at least pretended to), and may well have continued her assault, but her brother had read the whole contract and started realising we had the whip hand.
“What if we do not all sign?” he asked fearfully.
