Page 70 of House of Pawns
And I wear a black gown that Lillian made me. It hugs and curves my body. It has a sweetheart neckline and lace that stretches up over my collarbones to a severe collar. It’s intimidating and regal and perfect.
“Don’t worry about us,” Samuel says, crooking a smile in one corner of his mouth—it isn’t entirely convincing. “We’reall already dead. It’s you who’s guaranteed not coming out of this alive.”
“Samuel,” Lillian hisses. The look on her face is quite displeased.
But each of their eyes turns to me. Samuel is right. They have all already died. Except for maybe Rath. But they’ve already come to this crossroads. They’ve already come back from the great unknown.
And right now, I’m feeling a little jealous of that fact.
“Are you sure this is what you want?” Nial asks. “To wait?”
I swallow hard. I once offered myself up to them. I told Jasmine I wanted every one of them to drain me dry. It was a distraction then. A decoy for what I was really trying to do. But now… These people. They are my family.
“I’m sure,” I say, nodding. “I won’t put any of you at risk in any way. I fear if the King comes and I am already dead, he may not appreciate that. I won’t risk his anger toward any of you.”
Lillian stands and crosses the room to me. I rise to not quite her height.
She takes my hands. Her dark eyes, so dark they are nearly black, hold mine, and I see in her what Ian doubted. Loyalty.
“You are a beautiful person, Alivia. Jasmine never would have done for us what you have. And in sacrifice, I know every one of us can see that you,you, were born to do this. You were born to lead the Southern House.”
Markov steps forward, holding my eyes. Lillian lets go of my hands and makes room for him. Never looking away, he drops to one knee before me, taking one of my hands in his.
“I’ve lived a long life,” he says. “And I know how rare it is tofind a leader worth following. Alivia Ryan Conrath, I pledge my fealty to you and your House.”
He presses a gentle kiss to my hand, holding it almost in reverence.
Samuel kneels next to Markov. My heart leaps into my throat as I feel this heavy weight anchoring us all together. It is something that will change everything.
He takes my hand in his. “I’ve heard stories of Elijah and loyalty and trust. I watched my father do his best. And I watched Jasmine wreck everything the House could have been. I’ve seen a lot. But I’ve never pledged allegiance to anything. I don’t have my brother by my side, and for both of us, that’s a first. I know you understand what it means when I tell you, I pledge my fealty. Unconditionally.”
I nod to him, fighting back the tears at the back of my eyes.
My eyes shift to Nial, who walks forward. He takes both my hands in his, holding my eyes solidly. He’s quiet for a moment, as if he ponders what to say. “You gave me a family when I thought I would never experience that word again. You are my blood, Alivia, and I, yours.”
“You are my brother,” I say to him quietly.
“You know I am with you.” I look up and see Anna. Her eyes burn with intensity. And her staying, it means something, because she could survive out on her own just fine.
“And I have no idea what the hell fealty means, but it sounds awesome, so I’m that too,” Cameron says. My eyes shift over to him and a smile crooks on my lips. He holds up his fist and I know it counts for everything when I fist-bump him.
My eyes slide back to Rath, who stands by the door, hands folded over his lap.
“And you’re sure I cannot convince you to leave?” I ask. It’s a weight that sinks in my heart, burning a hole through it before dropping into the acid of my stomach.
“My place has always been with this family,” Rath says. His eyes fix on mine. Deep and soulful. “That does not change because of the presence of a King.”
I stare at him far too long. But finally, I can just nod. And feel eternally grateful.
Lastly, my eyes shift to Raheem.
He stands in the corner. He winds a bit of leather round and round his wrist. His black eyes watch my Houses confessional and his expression is complicated. I look at him, for a long time. He doesn’t say anything.
Finally, his eyes meet mine. And there’s everything there. So much that is so complicated. But it’s only there for a moment before he pulls off the wall and walks out of the room.
“Be watchful,” I say to my House members. I swallow hard. So much will happen tonight. So much will change.
They each give me a nod and I follow after Raheem.
