Page 31 of Ruthless Savior
She tips her chin up, and I see her eyes flick down to my groin. A flicker of nervousness enters her eyes. “This is what I’m offering.” Her voice is tight, as if she’s trying to keep it from betraying the same nerves that I see in her eyes. “Take it or leave it."
Fuck. The temptation is so strong it’s almost painful. I forgot what it was like to want like this, to feel this spark, this desirefor another person. I’m not sure I’ve ever felt it before with this immediacy. But it doesn’t change the situation in the slightest.
She thinks that she can sleep with me once and then walk away free and clear. She has no idea that paying off her loan wouldn't actually solve anything.
I can’t allow myself to be that kind of man. The guilt I already feel for having the desire at all is heavy.
"No, Leila." I shake my head and force myself to take another step back. "I won't take advantage of you like that."
"You wouldn't be taking advantage," she protests, frustration creeping into her voice. "I'm offering freely. I'm choosing this."
"You're choosing this because you think it's your only option," I correct her. "But it's not going to fix anything. Even if I went to Neil and paid your debt, even if I gave Rocco whatever it is that he paid for you, it wouldn’t change what’s happened. They’re still going to come after you and anyone you care about because of the principle of it. Because Rocco believes you belong to him, and the fact that you’re not in his possession is an insult. If anything, they'll be more determined to get you back."
I watch as the hope dies in her eyes, replaced by something that looks dangerously close to despair. The look of rejection is gone, and I can see her wilt in front of me. I hate it. It makes me want to reach for her, and that feeling startles me even more than the intensity of my desire for her.
"So what am I supposed to do?" she asks, her voice small. "Just stay here forever? Let my mother think I'm dead?"
"No." I run a hand through my hair, suddenly feeling exhausted. This whole situation is fucked, and I'm not sure there's a clean way out of it. "We'll figure something out. But not like this. Not with you offering yourself to me like some kind of payment."
The word 'payment' comes out harsher than I intended, and I immediately regret it when I see her flinch. But the damage is done.
“You need to stay here,” I tell her firmly. “This is the only place you’ll be safe until I can put an end to all of this.”
A stubborn defiance flashes across her face. “I can’t,” she bites out. “My mother?—”
“I will make sure your mother is taken care of.” I lean one hip against my desk, keeping the distance between us. “Medical bills, care, someone to help her, whatever she needs. But you need to stay here.”
Her expression turns to shock. “That’s going to cost a fortune, Ronan.”
I feel my body tense at the sound of my name on her lips. It sounds so much better than it should, and I force myself not to think of what her soft voice would sound like if she moaned it. “That’s not important. Money is no object to me. If it will keep you here, under my roof, I’m happy to do it.”
“You can’t possibly mean you’ll do that for free. For nothing in return.” She frowns, a small line appearing between her eyes. “Is that what you’re offering me in exchange for—” She swallows hard, then gestures at herself. “Me? You’ll provide for my mother if I sleep with you?”
I stare at her, even as my cock jerks against my fly at the thought. “Christ, woman. Have you not heard a word I’ve said? No. I’m not going to touch you. You don’t owe me anything. The only thing I want in return is for you to stay here, in my house, and not make any more attempts to run off on your own and leave. Barefoot, at that.”
I see her wince as she realizes that I know about her excursion last night. “My men tell me everything,” I tell her gently. “I was informed you tried to make a break for it last night, very ill-equipped to do so.”
“You said I could leave.” Her chin has a stubborn tilt to it.
“I wasn’t about to let you leave in the middle of the night. And nothing has changed, Leila. I’m not going to lock you in a room indefinitely, but if you leave, you will die, or wish you were dead once they get ahold of you. And you might not be the only one who suffers.” I let out a heavy breath. “Just stay. Let me protect you until this is handled. And I’ll make sure your mother is provided for in every way she needs. If she needs better doctors, I’ll pull strings. I mean it, Leila,anything. Just don’t make me have to worry that you’re going to run off and right back into Rocco’s trap.”
She bites her lower lip, and I force myself not to stare at her mouth. After a moment, she nods.
“Alright,” she says softly. “But I want to talk to my mom.Me. I want to let her know I’m as safe as I can be right now.”
“I’ll figure out a way to make that happen,” I promise her. “But it might take a little time. For now, I’ll focus on making those arrangements for her, and then we’ll see about a phone call.”
For a moment, she looks like she wants to argue, but then she nods. “Okay.”
“Go get some breakfast. You need to eat.” She does, but I also need her out of my office so that I can fucking think. I’m still reeling from her offer, from seeing her standing there in Siobhan’s clothes, telling me I can have her virginity if I get her out of this. My cock is throbbing, my entire body still keyed to the idea that I could fuck this woman if I just saidyes, and I need her out of this room. I need to stop looking at her, smelling that sweet honey scent on her skin, long enough to clear my head.
Leila nods, shoving her hands into the jeans’ pockets as she turns to go. She reaches the office door, and then pauses, glancing back at me.
"I'm sorry," she says quietly. "I didn't mean to… I wasn't trying to cheapen what you're doing for me. I just… I don't know how to handle any of this. I don't know how to be helpless. I’ve been trying to handle all of this, and I fucked it all up, and now I’m just… I have to just sit here and wait. It’s hard."
The apology hits me right in the chest. She thinks she's the one who should be apologizing, when I'm the one who's keeping her here, who made her situation go from bad to worse. I saved her, yes, but I’ve also managed to make what she’s dealing with so much more complex because of my feud with Rocco.
“You’re not helpless,” I tell her firmly. “You’re strong. I can tell. Plenty of people wouldn’t have survived what you have so far, or it would have broken them. You didn’t break, and that’s impressive, Leila. It really is. But you can be strong and not have to handle everything on your own.”
