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U into some freaky shit. Me next.

Will3atYou0ut4Tacos

On a scale of 1-10, how horny are you right now?

FutureStepDad3081

I’m not saying I’m daddy…but I am saying you look adoptable.

TaterThot

Call me Mr. Potato Head…because I’m ready to mash

The scowl on my face could have been tattooed on.

Delete, delete, delete, and delete.

Alright, the last guy did make me chuckle, but he was absolutely not the vibe I was looking for with my darker interests.

I didn’t want to fuck a potato.

“God,” I muttered to myself. “I should have just downloaded Ponder to get laid.”

Right as I was about to close the app and get started on the day, another message came in. I had half a mind to delete it on demand and deactivate my profile already, but the words in the chat bubble made me pause before I could.

PreyForUs

‘PetalstoFangs,’ huh? Is there any meaning to that?

Shrugging, I decided to answer. At least that one had decent grammar, and I really didn’t want to get ready for work just yet. Worst case scenario, I could just block them if they turned out to be as lame as the previous usernames, anyway.

PetalstoFangs

You could say that. I don’t think I’m the same girl I was from a few years ago. Reinventing myself, I suppose.

The response was immediate.

PreyForUs

I don’t think any of us are the same person we were years ago. Life has a way of doing that to us.

What’s your story?

PetalstoFangs

My story? What do you mean?

PreyForUs

Yeah. Why aren’t you the same girl you used to be? I can get popcorn for the lore if it would make you feel better. Or we can exchange stories.

I’ll show you mine if you show me yours ;)

I snorted at that one. I never thought I would receive that in the context of trauma. It also made me smile that this human used the termlore, too.

Whoever I was talking to definitely passed the vibe check, more than ever.

Sighing, I decided to go with a lacking but truthful answer.