Page 38 of Preyless
Casey stood again and placed a quick kiss on both mine and Aiden’s mouths. No other words needed to be spoken. And as Aiden nudged me through the opened glass doors of the shower, making both of their intentions clear, the wonder in my mind simply shifted to peace.
“Tell us about him?”Aiden asked as we all lay in their bed. The shower was quick, all of us opting to just wash the sweat and dirt away from our bodies. My hair laid damp against his chest while Casey rested on his other peck. I wore one of their t-shirts, and I could have sworn they were genuine giants once I put it on and realized it came down to my knees.
I picked my head up slightly to look at them both with a raised brow. “My husband?”
Casey hummed in response.
My head plopped back down. I know it was an innocent question, considering their reactions from earlier. And of course, they were well within their rights to ask, considering I had requested dark scenes and kinks for nothing but my own benefit.
Because of him.
“What do you want to know?”
Casey was the first to speak. “Would you have stayed if he didn’t die?”
I blinked. That wasn’t the question I was expecting. “I don’t know. I’ve talked to my therapist a lot about that hypothetical since his car accident. Maybe? I didn’t know any better. In fact, some days, I thought all women went through the exact same thing I did. I thought it was normal to be more of a servant thana partner. But ultimately…I was still just a girl in love with a boy who had once treated her like she was his entire world.”
“Why did he stop?”
My heart squeezed in anguish at the truth. I laid out all of the words clearly. “We were pregnant. And I miscarried. He wanted to try again immediately, since the doctors said it was just an unfortunate case of ectopic pregnancy rather than anything we could have potentially done, but it was just so painful. I didn’t want to. At one point, I didn’t want to have sex at all. Then he started wearing cologne and going out more at night…and I just knew what was happening, you know? I’m not stupid.”
I paused, looking over at them both, only to find them giving me their complete and utter attention. Casey reached for my hand and squeezed it gently. A shudder went through me as I continued. “Then the drinking began. Then the name calling. And it just spiraled until there was no going back. And eventually…all of my noes fell on deaf ears. Except on the days that my denials turned into punishments.”
Aiden’s voice was heavy. “And your punishments were what we did tonight?”
I sniffled as tears lined my vision, and nodded. “Yeah. Cat and mouse. He would wear scary masks, since I hated horror movies. Or initiate sex only for it to turn into a way to gag me so I couldn’t tell him to stop when it became too rough. I’m sure there are more examples, too.”
Casey spoke as he squeezed my hand again. “I’m so sorry, darlin’. You didn’t deserve that.”
A sad laugh escaped me. “It’s okay. I mean, it’s not, but it is. He can’t hurt me anymore. I just think I'll forever mourn that he did what he wanted to. Turned me into the victim he wanted. I crave what he forced me to go through. And I struggle with knowing if that makes me powerful or weak.”
Aiden shifted. I felt his hand cup my jaw, and my eyes flew up to meet his. “I promise you, pretty girl. I have met some very weak men and women in my life. My own father was extremely abusive to me and my siblings, and that was the definition of a weak man. You are the polar opposite of that definition. And we will prove that to you every damn day for the rest of our lives if you let us.”
I swallowed roughly. “I have a question.”
Casey answered. “Yes?”
“What would happen if I decided I still wasn’t ready to have kids? After the excitement of tonight dies, I mean. Would you both kick me to the curb next?”
Aiden’s smile was sad, but his words were firm and patient. “We wouldn’t actually trap you with a child, pretty girl. Sure, we do want children. We’ve never lied about that. Frankly, we’ve been obsessed with you since we saw your first profile picture and bio on that damn app. But it is still your body and mind that will have to go through a pregnancy, and we understand that you have trauma. It is always your choice.”
Casey added to Aiden’s response. “We will support you no matter what.”
My heart melted at the honesty they both shared.
My words were heavy. “It was hard for us to get pregnant the first time. Before the miscarriage. I don’t know if it’ll be easy. Or if I’ll miscarry again.”
Aiden pressed a kiss to my temple before laying a hand on my stomach. Casey followed his movements exactly. “We’re not here for easy.”
“And if it takes time, then it takes time. We still want to try this with you,” Casey added.
I smirked up at them. “For such scary, important men, you sure do have lots of big feelings.”
The sound of the smack on my ass echoed throughout the room before the stinging pain even registered.
I yelped and rubbed at it with a pout. “Rude.”
Aiden snorted before slapping my hand away and rubbing at the mark himself. “Brat.”
