Page 59 of Electric Blue Love
“Me three,” Bianca said looking young and shy as she glanced to me. “Their pancakes are the best.”
“I guess me four then.”
“Just wheat toast and fruit for me,” her father said with a grimace.
“Doctor told him he has high cholesterol,” Bianca whispered in my ear as she handed her mom our menus. With a conspiratorial smile, she scooted closer to me.
I watched Mrs. Winters out of the corner of my eye. Her gait was off, not slow but unsteady. Why hadn’t Bianca told me? And immediately I resented all the things I didn’t know. The things I hadn’t thought to ask because I was a selfish prick who didn’t ask the type of questions that invited others to share about their families.
“Leo, what’s the name of that band you like, The Black something or other – six letters.” Mr. Winters stared down at his crossword puzzle, pencil in hand.
Leo looked up from his sketch. “The Black Crowes.”
“That’s not it. Crows is only five letters.”
“It’s The Black Crowes,” he said again in that teenage way that pushed he was right without further explanation.
“There’s an e in it – C-R-O-W-E-S,” I said as I lifted the coffee mug to my lips.
Leo really looked at me for the first time, studying me. “You’rea fan of The Black Crowes?”
I could hear his accusation that it wasn’t possible I had any clue about a band as deep and dark as The Black Crowes. I guessed looking at me today it’d be hard to read beyond the nice clothes and practiced demeanor, so I didn’t flinch too much at his reaction.
“Sure, I saw their Say Goodnight to the Bad Guys show in electric and acoustic.”
“Bad ass. Did they do any Beatles covers?”
“Yeah a couple.”
“God, that had to have been nuts.”
I thought back to not only the concert, but also that time in my life. I’d been a train wreck. I guess most people probably looked back at their twenties with some sort of mature cringing. “Yeah, it was pretty insane. Are you into other early nineties bands?”
Bianca groaned loudly.
“Oh no, you didn’t?” She shook her head playfully and I looked from her to Leo who just smirked. “You had to ask didn’t you.” She stood and motioned for me to get up. “We might as well switch spots so you two can go all fanboy.”
I didn’t miss the pleased smile she gave me. A thousand things communicated between us.
Her: Thank you for coming.
Me: Thank you for inviting me.
Me: I like your family.
Her: I appreciate your trying to talk to my brother.
It turned out Leo and I had a similar taste in lots of things from music to movies to video games. The pancakes came, and I dug in with the rest of the family.
Bianca and her father poured over the crossword between bites, Donnie bounced between the puzzle and mine and Leo’s conversation. He was more reserved with his words than Leo, but he hadn’t made me feel like an outsider, giving me the same courtesies he gave everyone else at the table, so I guessed that was something.
What I didn’t miss was the way Bianca stole glances at me. Her face was so full of love for her family and happiness just sitting around a table with them barely talking. The only time I noticed a crack in her happiness was when her mom came to the table. It was a sort of sad, resigned look that she peered up at her mother with and I’d have loved nothing more than to stand up and tell Mrs. Winters to take my seat and let me be the one to wait on them. I didn’t because one, that would be weird as shit and two, I’d have made for a lousy server, but it seemed all wrong sitting and enjoying the morning when she should have been in my spot.
“How were the pancakes?” she asked me as she cleared the plates.
I patted my stomach in response. “Best pancakes I’ve ever had.”
She shot me a delighted smile and then fixed her stare on the twins. “Boys, did you finish your resumes so your sister could take a look before she leaves?”
