Page 69 of The Tip-Off
“They mean that you lived. You’re here with me right now. If you think that your scars make me want you any less, you’re wrong. I want you because of them. I want you because you’re here and you’ve made me feel more alive in the past month than I have my entire life. You lived and you brought me to life.”
I try and make her feel and believe with my touch. Soft caresses of her skin. Light kisses trailing over her collarbone and down. I undo the button of her shorts with trembling hands. There’s only this small piece of denim material keeping me from seeing all of her. She takes the initiative and pushes them down. I’m a goner, unable to look anywhere but at her and I’m definitely not subtle about my appreciation.
I take a step back and just keep right on staring at her, wondering how I got so lucky and imagining all the ways I want to show and prove to her that I’m not lying when I say I think she’s beautiful. No, not just beautiful. The most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
In basketball, we refer to this moment as the triple threat. It’s when a player first gets possession of the ball and can pass, shoot, or dribble. The full range of offensive options are at his disposal. For five seconds, he can question which move to make, but after that, after he makes a move, the options dwindle. Do nothing and he turns the ball over to the other team. Five perfect seconds under pressure to make a decision that can make or break an offense.
This moment feels just like that and I consider my options carefully.
One Mississippi.
Two Mississippi.
Three Mississippi.
Four Mississippi.
36
Gabby
My chest heavesand I suck in a breath while Zeke stares at me. Before the accident, I derived my self-worth, at least in part, from being a beautiful and outgoing girl. Since then, I’ve battled the things people say against the reality of how I feel. People tell me beauty is skin deep. They’re wrong. The longing I feel to be seen as beautiful is rooted deep in my soul.
Right now, I believe I am.
“Lie on the bed.” His voice is deep and thick with emotion.
He pulls the shirt over his head and pushes his shorts and boxers to the floor. When he stands tall, nearly seven feet of muscled perfection, I’m drawn to him in a way that has nothing to do with the way he looks, and I wonder if it’s the same for him.
I hope so… and also not. I want him to want me because he thinks I’m beautiful, but I don’t want him to ignore the ugly either. I want someone to love me for the ugly and the beautiful, and every shade in between. True vulnerability is being seen for everything you are, the good and the bad, and Zeke is the first person I’ve let see every part of me. The fact that he seems to like me, just the way I am, is breathtaking and terrifying all at once.
He starts at my feet, dropping kisses to my ankle and moving up slowly, not skipping an inch of skin. He does the same to the other leg before he climbs on top of me and takes my mouth in the softest and sweetest caress, tracing my lips with his fingers and then his tongue.
Threading his hands through my hair at the nape of my neck, he pulls my hair away from my face and gazes into my eyes.
“Are we gonna have sex now, big guy, or what?” My voice comes out sounding small, the humor I’d meant to inflict not quite hitting the mark.
“Don’t rush me, beautiful girl.” He smirks and grinds his erection against my hip. He brushes a quick kiss on my lips and then pushes himself up so he’s hovering over me. “I gotta get a condom.”
“Wait.” I wrap my arms around him to keep him from leaving. “I’m on birth control.”
“Good.” Is his only response before dropping his mouth to take my left nipple into his mouth.
I squeeze my eyes closed so I don’t have to see his perfect mouth against the scars that wrap around the sensitive mound.
“Hey,” he whispers. “Open your eyes.” He takes my nipple again, sucks and then lets it free with a pop. “Just watch me.”
By the time Zeke finishes kissing literally every inch of my body, I’m practically feverish with my need to come. With his eyes locked on mine, he pushes inside of me, and I watch as his face contorts with the same mixture of contentment and a desire for more. So much more.
I’m spinning so fast. Pleasure mixed with emotion makes my orgasm rise to the surface so quickly we’re just getting started and I’m already so close.
“You’re so fucking beautiful, Gabby.” The words come whispered into my ear and I believe him. That belief takes me over the edge, and I respond by screaming his name over and over like a prayer.
37
Gabby
“Movie room in five.”Joel peeks his head into Zeke’s room and then dashes away.
