Page 59 of The Fake
“Is that a no?” I chuckle and move off him so fast I wonder if I dreamt the burn on my skin from the contact.
Wrapping his arm around me and pulling me back close, his voice reverberates against my back. “May never be ready.”
Nope, definitely didn’t dream the scalding feeling of his skin touching mine because it’s back and lighting my insides on fire.
I stay quiet then, sinking into his hard chest, listening to the ocean and enjoying the gentle lull of his steady breathing. I feel so safe and untouchable like this. I don’t need Nathan to protect me, not here, but the idea that he might want to makes everything else as insignificant as we are to the ocean.
An older couple walks by hand in hand. I’ve seen them before, though it’s been a few months now. They walk the beach together every morning.
Today I notice how they’re smiling at one another and looking more in love than I would have guessed possible at that age. Funny, I never noticed that before. I’d always assumed they were married, but I’d never been able to see the love surrounding them.
“Alright, I guess I’m ready,” Nathan says, sounding like he’d rather eat sand than leave.
“No.” I push harder against his chest to prevent him from moving. “Just a few more minutes.”
* * *
“You’re on my team,” Camila says to our friend Jill, who joined us for a day at the beach. Jill is one of the few who didn’t turn on me after the shit last year, but we’re not as close as I am with Cam.
“Seems only fair since I got the best player out here.” Nathan hugs me from behind and kisses the top of my head. Without my teammates, I don’t feel the need to pretend to be anything we’re not so every touch and glance between us makes my heart flutter.
Camila makes a retching sound. “Ugh, you two are going to make my lunch come up.”
She and Jill take their positions on the other side of the net, and Nathan reluctantly lets me go. Or at least that’s what I’d like to think since he inches away slowly, not dropping his fingertips from me until he can’t reach.
Jill serves to my right, and I lunge to save it. Nathan takes his time setting it and I spike it over right between Cam and Jill.
We take the point and I move to serve. It’s my favorite part of volleyball, I think because it’s one thing I can control. Once a serve is over the net, it’s all reactionary. Sharp senses and repetition training until the movements happen almost on instinct are key. But serving is all about power and control.
Nathan is a natural and his height is a definite help. We win the first game, and he lifts me up to celebrate. I’m screaming, babbling nonsense mostly, as he runs a lap around the beach. When he can’t carry me any longer, he sets me down and falls to the ground beside me. I lay back, letting the sun kiss my skin, and Nathan’s eyes scan the full length of me.
He takes me by surprise when he covers my body with his and kisses me on the mouth. It’s just a quick, chaste kiss, but I wrap my arms around his neck and demand more.
It’s not until I hear Camila and Jill drop down close to us and he pulls back that I realize him devouring me was for show. At least I think it was. He’s sporting that smirk that does me in every single time, and his eyes are a dark blue that makes me wonder if he’s as keyed up as I am.
I know this is fake, but my libido doesn’t and even if she did, I think she’d tell me to pipe the fuck down and let her have her moment.
“You guys want to go back and get showered and changed for tonight?” Camila asks when Nathan has removed his fabulous body from mine and sits in the sand in front of me.
Nathan looks at me as he answers and his deep voice rakes over me. “Yeah, let’s shower.”
* * *
When we get inside our room for the weekend—my old room—I glance at all our stuff tossed around and the mess makes me smile. Sharing space with him makes me insanely happy.
“Today was fun. I’m glad you came,” I say as I pull out the dress I want to wear tonight.
“Me too.”
“I’m going to tell her.” I motion with my head to the door and the general direction of Camila’s room. “I thought about it, and I don’t want to leave here with anything hanging over my head. When I moved to Valley, I was still carrying so much pain from everything, but I’m not anymore. I’m happy.” He shoots me a questioning glance. “I am. I mean, the situation with the team isn’t perfect, but it has nothing to do with Camila and lying to her… well, it just doesn’t feel right. She deserves the truth. She’s stuck with me this long.”
Nathan takes my hand and squeezes. “I’ll be here. Whatever you need.” He clears his throat. “That reminds me. Cam mentioned you might be moving back to California.”
I shake my head. “My parents worked out a deal with the university so I could finish my degree here, but too much has happened. Valley is the clean start I need. My chance to prove that I can make it on my own.”
“I get that,” he says. “That’s how I felt my freshman year when I got to college, but don’t confuse clean start with avoidance.”
I tense at his words.
