Page 56 of Bad Crush
“I saw Lori last weekend when I went to my parents’ for Sunday dinner.”
“Oh, yeah?” I look anywhere but at her.
“She’s doing really great, Reagan. The old house is cleaned up, and she’s working at the elementary school as an aide.”
“They let her work with children?! Someone should be fired for that hire.”
Janine doesn’t react like someone else might to my outburst. She smiles sadly. “My mom got her the job, but she’s working hard.”
“Whatever. Good for her. Is that what you want me to say?”
“I just thought you should know. She’s still your mom, Rea.”
“Yeah, well, she didn’t act much like one for the first eighteen years of my life, so I’m sorry if I’m not eager to hear how great she’s doing now. Those kids at the school probably see more of her in a week than I did for months at a time when I was their age.” The more I talk, the angrier I get. She’s doing great now, really? Now that I’m capable of taking care of myself. Now that I don’t need her.
“I’m sorry. I can’t imagine how you feel.”
“You’re right. You can’t.” Janine with her perfect family. A mom who dotes on her and a dad who would go to the ends of the earth for her.
“She asked how to get in touch with you. Said the number she has for you doesn’t work, and she wasn’t sure your email was still the same.”
“Are you kidding me?” I roll my eyes.
Janine’s lips flatten.
“If I wanted to talk to her, I would have responded to one of the many emails she’s sent over the years.”
“So you are getting them?”
“What is this, an interrogation?”
“No, of course not.” Janine rests her palms on the table. “This isn’t going like I imagined. You have every right to your feelings, but if there was even a chance you wanted to know how she was, I thought I should tell you.”
“Well, you’ve told me.” I push back in my chair. “See you around.”
I rush out of University Hall, holding back angry tears. Outside, I hang a right, then slump against the brick building and take deep pulls of the cold air.
Janine finds me. I should have expected her to follow me. She left me alone for three years, and that’s longer than I expected. She has a good heart, wants everyone to be happy. She still believes that everyone can have what she does, even after watching me grow up with a mom who didn’t give a shit.
“Go away, Janine. There’s nothing you can say to fix this.”
She shakes her head slowly. “There’s something else.” She pauses and wets her lips, tugs her hat down over her ears. “I told her that you were engaged.”
“What?!” A shiver of dread runs up my spine.
“I wanted her to know how well you’re doing.”
“She doesn’t deserve to know anything about me. You had no right.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“Does Adam know about any of this?”
“No.” Her brows pull together in confusion. “Why?”
“It’s none of his business or yours.”
“I’m so sorry, Reagan. I know that it’s not the same, but I was mad at her all these years too. I saw what she did to you, and I guess I wanted her to know that despite all of that, you had still found a way to make a great life. You didn’t need her.”
