Page 110 of In Your Wildest Dreams
I like him too much to pretend I don’t feel the same. I like him so much. He’s reminded me that there are great guys out there and that relationships don’t have to be a roller coaster. Every day just gets better than the last.
“I don’t want to be with anyone else either. You make me very happy.”
He smiles and brushes his lips over mine again.
My chest tightens. “But for now, I think we should keep things casual and discreet. At least until the season is over.”
That’s a few months away and if we both still feel the same, then we can figure it out. When it will make the least waves possible. I would never forgive myself if being with me caused problems for his career. I know what hockey means to him.
“Exclusively casual?” I ask, hopeful it’s enough for him for now.
A flicker of what could be disappointment flashes across his face and then he nods. “Yeah. All right. Whatever you want, babe, but I’m yours.”
* * *
The next morning I wake up to the smell of coffee and bacon. I pull on one of Ash’s T-shirts, brush my teeth, and then head out to find him in the living room. He’s on the couch with an iPad on his lap. He’s shirtless with sweats and no socks. He looks so adorable and at home that it makes the furrow between his brows more pronounced.
“Morning,” I say as I walk in.
His expression shifts and he smiles as he sets the device beside him. “Morning, beautiful. There’s coffee and food in the kitchen.”
“Exactly how long have you been awake?” I climb onto his lap, straddling him as I lean in to kiss him.
“Awhile,” he admits. “I couldn’t sleep, and I didn’t want to wake you with all my tossing and turning.”
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah,” he says, in a tone that’s not at all convincing. “I was just watching some clips from last night’s game.”
I glance down at the iPad beside us. A frozen image of little green men on the ice. Sliding off him, I pick it up and press play. There he is, speeding down the ice with the puck.
“It’s pretty impressive,” I say.
“What’s that?” He smooths my hair away from my face with a hand he rests along my neck.
“You. Your job. Being a professional hockey player. It’s a cool job and you’re amazing.”
He smiles and a soft chuckle rumbles in his chest. “It is a cool job, but I’m not really thatamazing. Not like Jack or Leo or some of the other guys.”
Confusion knits my brow. “Is that like saying you’re the worst of exceptionally talented players? Because that still makes you amazing.”
He laughs again and takes the iPad from me. “I just mean I’m not a guy that makes a difference out there in the same way. Without Jack or Leo, the team would fall apart. Jack is our captain—he keeps everyone motivated and happy, whatever the cost, and he’s one of our top scorers every season. Leo is a quiet, natural leader. Guys look up to him. And we can always count on him in the playoffs. The man has another gear in the spring.”
I wonder if it’s something Gabe said that has got in his head. I know how easy it is to let other people’s opinions create self-doubt, but I never would have thought my cocky Ash would doubt how absolutely incredible he is. “You’re wrong. What you bring to the team is just as valuable.”
He smirks, obviously amused by my comment, but there’s a glint of hope and vulnerability that pushes me to keep going.
“I don’t know hockey that well, but I see how you are with your teammates. They love and respect you. Not because they have to, but because you’re good and loyal. You make people feel seen and capable, and it pushes them to be better. That’s such a rare quality. Don’t undervalue yourself.”
“You’re something, you know that?”
“I do,” I say proudly. Thanks to him.
He tosses the iPad to the far end of the couch and then brings a hand up to caress my neck.
“You gave me a hickey,” I say as he lets his thumb glide along the mark on my skin.
“I know.” A real smile finally pulls his lips apart. He shifts so he’s on top of me. “And I plan to give you another on the other side before you leave here.”
