Page 124 of In Your Wildest Dreams
“So do you.” Grace squeezes my arm.
“If he were to lose his spot on the team because of me…I couldn’t live with that.”
Scarlett peers in from the hallway. “Are you okay?”
I nod even though I’m not sure.
Jade, Piper, and Dakota are right behind her.
“I don’t know the whole story, but your ex sounds like a real piece of shit,” Jade says.
That makes an unexpected chuckle slip from my mouth.
“Whatever happened, we’ll figure it out, okay?” Scarlett smiles. “If my dad didn’t suspend him immediately then it couldn’t have been too bad.”
I blow out a breath. “I should go. I don’t really feel like watching the game anymore. Thank you for inviting me over.”
“You are always welcome,” Scarlett says. “I meant what I said earlier. We’ve got your back. Ash adores you and so do we.”
“You’re stuck with us, don’t try to fight it.” Dakota winks at me, which does ease a little of my anxiety. A little but not enough.
“Thank you. I just want to go home and take a long bath.”
“I’m coming with you,” Everly says.
“Me too. I’ll grab our stuff.” Grace brushes past us out of the bathroom.
“No, you guys should stay.” The last thing I want on top of everything else is to ruin their night.
“We love you,” Everly says. “You’re upset and we want to be there. You don’t have to talk to us or even be in the same room as us, but we’re going with you because that’s what friends do.”
A tear betrays me and falls down my face. “Damn you for being such good friends.”
She grins. “Just giving it back the same way you give.”
* * *
I spend the rest of the night an anxious mess. What am I going to say to him? I’m sorry doesn’t feel like enough. I compose a dozen text messages that I don’t send. Should I walk away? Everly says that’s letting Gabe win, and that isn’t what I want either. Ash always plays it off like everything will be fine. I love that he has this unwavering loyalty and determination to stand up for what’s right, but I know how much his team and hockey mean to him.
At midnight, exhausted from crying and worrying, I finally send one of the many texts I’ve composed.
Me
Maybe we should cool things off for a while?
Or maybe for good? I can’t help but think that none of this is fair to him. My throat is thick with emotion while I wait for his response. He’s said so many times that he wants me and that this isn’t casual, but that was before it was impacting his job. I wouldn’t blame him for protecting that.
36
PAIN AND PUNISHMENT
BRIDGET
I skip classes on Tuesday.I can’t remember the last time I did that. I woke up to a single text.
Ash
It’s going to take a lot more than some asshole ex-boyfriend to scare me off.
