Page 60 of Burnout
“What?” Hendrick sits up.
I’m frozen at first, then I shake it off. I sign instead of speaking.No. No way he’d show up here.
Archer had an accident when he was younger that caused him to lose his hearing. He’s legally Deaf and wears hearing aids. He can read lips really well, too, but signing is the easiest way to make sure he doesn’t miss anything in a big conversation.
“It did look kind of like him, but then again it’s been a while since I’ve seen your old man.”Brogan shrugs.
Our dad barely showed up to a single sporting event or class event in all the years Hendrick, Arch, and me were in school. I doubt he even knows Flynn hasn’t graduated yet. He stopped keeping tabs on us a long time ago, and I’ve made sure it stays that way.
“Where was he?”Hendrick signs, then glances toward the cafeteria.
“In the breezeway outside. I didn’t get a good look…” Arch trails off. “It probably wasn’t him.”
“I’ll go check.” Hendrick gets to his feet and takes off before I can tell him not to bother. It’s not him. No freaking way.
I tap my foot and stare out onto the court as Flynn takes shots from around the perimeter. I clap and try to shake off all thoughts of dear old dad, but Archer and Brogan are still talking about it.
“When’s the last time you saw him?” Brogan asks.
Archer tosses Raisinets into his mouth and thinks before replying, “I can’t even remember. On my birthday last year, he sent a card.”
“He did?” I ask. I didn’t know about that. It’s not the only time he’s reached out. He texted me a few times until I blocked him, and he dropped by once a few years ago on the date of Mom’s passing, but I’m the only one that saw him, and I got rid of him real fast. I didn’t need him fucking with anyone else by showing up on a day we all hate.
“Yeah. But I haven’t seen him since my graduation maybe. What about you?” Archer asks and waits for my answer.
“It’s been a long time.”
Hendrick comes back, shaking his head. “I didn’t see him.”
“I told you. It wasn’t him,” I say, but the pit in my stomach doesn’t go away.
Back at home, I’m in the garage punching the bag when Hendrick comes outside.
“What are you doing up, old man?” I ask him, stopping the bag with one hand. We didn’t get home until after nine and it was another hour before I made sure Flynn had done all hishomework, eaten, and showered. Hendrick was in his room with Jane when I came out here. I assumed everyone had gone to bed.
He paces in front of me. “I can’t stop thinking about tonight. Do you think Dad was there?”
“I don’t know,” I admit.
His dark brows pull together. “He stopped by the house once this summer saying he wanted to check in, asked about Flynn.”
“What?” My voice rises. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Because I knew you’d get worked up over it. You were gone at some race and when you got back you were training for the championship. I didn’t want to distract you with it. I handled it and nobody else knows.”
I let out a sigh of relief. Hendrick, Archer, and I are all in agreement about Dad. None of us want him around, but I’m not sure how Flynn would react. He was too young to remember what a shitty father he was. I don’t want him to go through what all of us did. Dad popping in and out randomly. Each time we’d get excited when he showed up, only to be let down when he left again.
And it isn’t like he was some great father when he was around anyway. It was a real mind fuck. We wanted him to be present, but then he showed up and it was like we forgot how much of an asshole he was. He and Mom fought constantly, he got irritated if we were too loud or too rowdy, which was always. My bike became my salvation.
I don’t know why the fuck we wasted so many years wishing he’d finally decide he wanted to be a dad. He sucked at it. We were better off without him. We still are.
“Justin Pushner. You remember him?” I ask Hendrick.
“Yeah. He was your grade, right?”
I nod. “The other night I saw him. He said Dad was hanging around the track. I didn’t believe him at the time. I thought hewas just trying to get a rise out of me, but maybe he was telling the truth.”
“Fuck.” Hendrick runs a hand over his jaw. “Do you think he’s back living in Valley?”
