Page 129 of Comeback
“I’ll be fine. My agent says Boston’s interested and the Cardinals might be looking for a new pitcher if their starter needs surgery.”
Despite his words, I can see the uncertainty taking a toll on him. As it would anyone in his shoes.
“You’ll land somewhere,” I say, in case he needs to hear it. He’s too talented and has too much promise to have his career end so abruptly.
The three of us order food from the bar and fall into easy conversation while eating and watching a hockey game on the TV above the bar. A classmate from college, Jordan Thatcher, plays for the Kings and they’re destroying Colorado.
While I’m ordering another beer, Brogan’s phone lights up on the bar in front of him.
“It’s London. She’s out with her sister tonight. Probably drunk dialing.” Grinning, he stands with his phone. “Be right back.”
Flynn watches him go, then glances at me. “It’s weird to see you two like this.”
“What do you mean?”
“Brogan with a fiancée.” Flynn flings a hand in the direction Brogan went and then waves it in front of me. “And you all sweet and lovey with Sabrina.”
“It’s not that strange. We’ve both dated people before.”
“Yeah, but this is different. You’re all grown up and mature and shit.”
A laugh rumbles in my chest. “Yeah, well, don’t be fooled. We’re not that mature.”
I reach over and grab him in a headlock, then ruffle his hair with my free hand.
He escapes, smoothing both hands over his head. “Not the hair. Chicks love the hair.”
“Nowthat’sweird,” I tell him, still chuckling. It’s nice sitting and talking with him. I can’t remember the last time we did this. “Are you dating anyone?”
“I’m dating everyone.” He flashes a cocky smile.
“Oh, brother,” I mutter under my breath with another huff of laughter.
“I talked to Dad before I left Minnesota. He’s thinking about settling back in Arizona.”
All those good feelings I was just enjoying, vanish.
“How is dear old Dad?” I ask him, taking a long drink of my beer.
“You’d know if you picked up the phone.”
A prickle works its way down my spine. I can’t remember the last time I talked to my dad on my own. Since Flynn started having a relationship with him, I’ve run into him a few times but at best we’re acquaintances. I don’t need him.
“Listen, I get why you want a relationship with him, but I don’t need or want him in my life,” I say to Flynn in case he has any ideas about pushing me to change my mind.
I really do understand Flynn’s desire to get to know him. He was too little to remember what it was like, how Dad was never around. Even before the accident, he was flaky but that seemed to be the final straw. I told Knox once that Dad left because he didn’t want to deal with me after I lost my hearing. It was one of those moments where I spoke my darkest fear, one ofthose things you hold on to, afraid even to give it a voice. I’d thought it for years, silently worrying that I was the reason that my brothers had lost a second parent. Saying it out loud finally helped me let it go.
And Knox didn’t try to talk me out of my feelings. I’ll never forget what he said. “If that’s true, then we’re all better off.”
Just like that. I guess I expected him to hate me a little for being the reason, but he didn’t.
I don’t know if it’s really the reason he took off or not, but I believe it played a part. Just one more problem he didn’t want to deal with. He isn’t the only one who stepped out of my life after I lost my hearing, but his loss was the worst. He hadn’t been a great dad before that but everything I’d learned about family said they’re supposed to love you no matter what. Maybe that’s not a reasonable ask, even for a parent.
Knox’s words all those years ago healed something inside me. The hurt for being abandoned and the need to keep out anyone that wasn’t going to accept me exactly as I am.
So, no, I don’t have any desire to let him back into my life, but Flynn never really had a chance at a relationship with either of our parents. He’ll never be able to get time back with our mom, but he can with dad. Far be it for me to hold that universal need against him.
Flynn turns slightly in his seat. “I know what he was like back then.”
