Page 20 of Fixer
“Huh.”
“With wolves, especially with your own Alpha, there’s an added layer, of course.Emotions, the scent of them and the feel over your bonds.Dad said the best way to hide one emotion, like fear at being questioned, was in another, like anger.If I seemed furious with Shawn for being gay— or for getting caught, which would feel the same— that’s what Alpha would notice.”
“Your father taught you to lie to yourAlpha?”
“Technically, he taught me to lieformy Alpha, but it worked out well the other way.”I shrugged, although talking about Dad made me miss him with a fierce ache.“On purpose, I suspect, so yeah, he taught me both.I’m pretty sure Dad knew about me before I did.”
“I’m surprised he didn’t try to get you away from the pack.”
“He kind of did.He urged me to go off to college.”Most wolves didn’t, because distance thinned the pack bonds.Or at least, they went in pairs, to still have packmates.There’d been no other boys my age in our pack.“But that was when Mom started getting sick, and by the time she passed, I was twenty-five and settled, and no one had suspected.”
“The couple you sent Shawn to live with.Were they a place your father planned for you?”
I shook my head.Say it?Don’t say it?I decided to take the leap.“That was my doing.They were actually… a place I’d found years earlier, for you.”
“For me?”Wade stared at me.
“Yeah.When you landed with us, with your mom asking for a new pack’s protection, you rang that might-be-gay bell for me.”
“I was fifteen.”
“So was Shawn.I knew long before I was fifteen.”
Our eyes met.His were wide and dark, but I couldn’t read what he was feeling.I tried to be as calm and open as I could.Would he deny it?Or let me in?
“You know,” Wade said, stepping back, “I should really call Mrs.French.Make sure all’s well with the building.I’ll give Shawn some cash for the call—”
“Wait,” I said as he turned to go.“If you’re really going to call her, I’ll drive you to a payphone a couple of towns over.”
“Why?”
“I didn’t work my ass off hiding Shawn to take any chances with him.Odds are, no one will ever find you, and if they do, they won’t suspect Shawn’s still alive.Your last name’s McKinley now, his is Banks, you have no connections.But I still don’t want his new number in the phone record of someone you’re close to.Or their number in his.”
Wade turned in the doorway, the light behind making him appear bigger than he was.“Wow.That’s a level of paranoia I didn’t expect.”
“Really?When my job has been to bribe, blackmail, lie, cheat, drug, and murder wolves out of trouble?When every pack has a wolf like me, doing the same?It’s not paranoia.”I heard the bitterness in my tone and stopped.
“I suppose.”He looked down.“After all,youmanaged to find me.”
Trying to lighten the moment, I said, “Of course, I am the best.”
That got him to lift his gaze.“Yeah, I guess so.You seriously tracked me down by my carvings?Most people didn’t even know I liked to whittle, let alone be able to recognize my style.”
“I wasn’t most people.”Something flashed between us, an awareness I couldn’t define.I set my wash bucket aside too.“Come on, I’ll drive you to Timberfalls, and we’ll find a payphone.”
Wade remained silent on the twenty-minute drive.I didn’t push for anything.He didn’t seem angry or upset, just thinking.The gas station had a payphone outside, and a much shorter line at the pumps than I was used to south of the border, though the price made me wince.“Go make your call,” I told Wade.“Do you have Canadian change for the phone?”
“Uh, no.”He palmed his forehead.
“The station will cash out American bills for you.One for one, probably, but you’ll get your coins.Most places here take US bills.”
“Got it.Thanks.”
I watched as he disappeared inside the cashier’s hut, then came out and went into the phone booth.The car ahead of me drove away, and I inched forward.Watching through the glass of the booth, I saw a moment when Wade straightened, his shoulders tense and his chin rising like he was scenting danger.I was so distracted watching him that the attendant rapping on my window made me jump.
I rolled the glass down.“Regular.Fill ’er up.Thanks.”
The car was fueled, windshield washed, and I’d pulled away from the pump before Wade came striding over.
