Page 17 of Change My Mind
I was silent.
Did I think that Eli was hot?
He was greyer now. Long streaks of it peppered around his temples, complementing the chocolate brown that made up the rest of his hair. There was stubble along his jaw now. That also had grey peppered in along his sideburns. His eyes were still a rich dark brown, although there was a sadness to them now. All the components of his face worked well together, and they were nice to look at. He had finally grown into his long limbs and filled out across the shoulders…and thighs.
He had nice hands.
And just before I fell asleep last night, I did have an image drop into my head of him moving through a sequence of yoga poses, which had the nerve to make my blood warm.
“He’s not unattractive,” I mumbled. Clara snorted as she shook her head.
“You are so full of shit.”
“I answered your question. Now it’s your turn. How is Jesse? You figure the proposal out yet?”
Clara leaned back on her stool, her hands coming behind her head. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
“He’s great. And no, I still haven’t figured it out. I don’t know why I’m finding it so hard. It’s not like it needs to be a production.”
“Well, what does it need to be?”
“It needs to bespecial. I’m not asking him if he wants to try out this new restaurant that is supposed to have killer cocktails. It’smarriage.”
“Well, how did you two end up moving in together? Was that a whole thing?”
“No, his lease was coming to an end, and he was basically living here anyway, so why not just make it official. It was barely even a conversation. It just happened. I think this would be easier if he hadn’t been there in the aftermath of the failure of the last one.”
“Yeah, but he turned it around, didn’t he? Wasn’t he the one who ate your lasagne?”
Her eyebrows drew together. “Did you intend to make that sound so sexual?” she queried. I laughed.
“Yes. No. Mostly yes. I don’t know what you want me to say here. I haven’t even been in the realm of getting close to asking someone to marry me. And I haven’t been around enough to have an idea of your dynamic with him. However, I imagine he wouldn’t care if it wasn’t ‘special’. The moment he knew you were even thinking about asking the question, he’d probably say yes.”
“Doesn’t he deserve more than that?”
“I don’t know. Maybe. Or maybe that is exactly what he needs. If he were asking you, wouldn’t you rather it happened while you were washing the dishes or something equally mundane?” Clara nodded. “Exactly, so maybe it doesn’t needto be this big thing that will be a great story when everyone inevitably asks how it happened. Maybe it just needs to be what you need it to be.”
“But he wouldn’t be the one asking. Jesse is all about the grand gesture. He loves receiving them.”
“And what is a bigger grand gesture than a woman, who had a proposal fail miserably on her, gathering the strength to try again?”
Clara paused for a moment before waving her hand vaguely in front of her and shaking her head. “We should stop talking about this before he comes home and wonders why we went deathly silent.” A smirk broke out on her face before she continued. “I have another question about your new flatmate. What was it about him that had you thinking so hard about whether or not he’s hot?”
I groaned. “I cannot stress how much I hate you right now.”
“It’s good to have you back, Addie.”
Thirteen
ELI
We had set a date for the staff and friends launch of the new menu for just under two weeks from now.
So, naturally, I was locked in an office that barely had space for the desk that occupied it, at Vivi’s, thinking about changing the chicken dish completely.
There was no need for me to feel such pressure about this menu. Xander and Darren were both pretty chill people as restaurant owners went. I hadn’t done anything more than shadow the current staff and get an idea of the way they worked with each other so far. The shock of how relaxed yet efficient the kitchen ran still hadn’t worn off. When I had read my contract, it made it abundantly clear that I was going to maintain a healthy work-life balance, whether I wanted to or not. They would give me a grace period while we got the changes that were coming off the ground, but after that, I could only work a certain number of shifts in a week and no doubles.
It went against almost everything I’d experienced workingin the culinary world for the past decade, and my fear over all that free time was manifesting itself as obsessing over this menu being perfect.
