Page 64 of Nothing to Lose: Lost Trilogy: Part 1
“Can’t you at least leave the following morning? That way you get some rest?”
She has no idea what she’s asking, and I hate how hopeful she looks. Her face is a mask of happiness, so sure that I will agree with her.
“I can’t.”
Two words, that’s it, but they have such a huge impact. She puts her face down and nods in disappointment.
“It’s so weird,” she starts talking. Her voice is soft where I can barely hear her over the blood rushing through my body. “We really only spent that little bit of time together in person when I was in Texas. But with all the hours we spent on the phone since, I feel like I know you so well. Like… like…”
“I know, babe,” I pull her into my arms. “I feel the same. That’s why I’m here now.”
“Why are you not staying longer then?”
“Because I can’t, babe.” I run my hand over her hair over and over, smoothing it down until it’s almost stuck to her scalp. I just can’t stop myself from comforting her.
“Is it because of the motorcycle club you’re in?”
I guess it makes sense that she would think that, but due to how things are in the club right now, the tension that’s mounting more with each passing day, I don’t want the club to pass her lips or ever enter her mind. Too late for that, but one can only hope.
“It is,” I admit to her now.
“Will it always be like this? Where you’ll be busy with the club, and you have to hide to see me once in a while?”
Her body is so tense now, it would snap and break if I didn’t handle her with care. What can I tell her?
That I am about to help blow the fuck out of the club?
That we have big plans to blow it up with our president in it?
That her father is masterminding this whole thing along with Wrecker?
Instead, I lie.
“The club is an important part of my life, babe. One that I committed to a long time ago.” Not by choice, and hopefully I can tell her that at some point.
“How would this work then?” She finally asks the million dollar question I was hoping to delay.
“We’ll make it work, babe.”
I let go of her when she struggles to get out of my hold. She leans over the bed and comes back up with the t-shirt she ripped off me when I got here hours ago.
I watch with what I’m sure to be pure lust in my eyes when she lets the sheet drop and pulls the t-shirt over her head, covering my two favorite assets of her. Well, they’re my number two favorite assets of hers. Number one would be her ass. It is all I’ve ever wanted in any girl I was with. Not very many have it…
“I can’t move to Texas,” she tells me out of the blue, interrupting my visions of her ass as she bounces on top of me, straddling me backward.
“What?” I ask in complete confusion.
“I can’t move to Texas. My father would not allow it. And it’s not just him,” she continues, completely ignoring my look of surprise. “I have my job here. I just enrolled in classes for my master’s degree. Becca is going too, so I won’t be alone. I got homework, and labs, and…”
“Why would you be moving to Texas?” I manage to interrupt her. Why would she be moving to Texas when I plan on moving here after I am out of the club?
“Oh, I thought that…” She looks completely dejected. “Never mind all that,” she gives me a quick, albeit fake, smile. “I misunderstood what we were talking about.”
I realize what she is thinking now. The problem is that I can’t risk her life and tell her my plans without breaking her heart. But it’s only a temporary break. I will heal it all back together once I’m officially here.
“I’m hungry,” she declares, and in a sudden move, she stands up and rushes out of the room.
I remain lying on her bed, my eyes glued to the doorway. There is nothing I can do right now to make her feel good. Not in the way she needs it anyway.
