Page 42 of Lose to Win: Lost Trilogy: Part 3
“Steve.”
13
Puck
My dearest Lucas,
I just love talking to you sometimes. I know you don’t like it at all, but I love listening to you talk even when you are angry with me. And you sure were tonight. You think I am trying to rob you of the money Blake left for you.
I made lots of mistakes with you. The most mistakes. But this was the one thing I swore that I would do right by you. I don’t even know why, but I feel like I owe it to you. It’s the only feeling I am still aware of in spite of Kenny pumping all kinds of things into me. He wants the money, all of it, and he thinks I will sign it all over to him if he keeps me drugged and drunk.
I probably would give him everything if I loved him. But I don’t think I do. It’s more of an obsession I’ve never been able to shake off. But he doesn’t make me happy. Nothing does, ever. I do have to admit though that my obsession with him took me on the wrong path in this life.
You asked me how I could put him ahead of my child. My answer to that would be that sometimes we are very passionate about things or people. We don’t think of the consequences when we choose to follow them. The price I had to pay for all my sins was you. And I am at peace with that.
* * *
We all make choices in this life. How can we know ahead of time if we choose right or wrong? I am choosing Emily. I will always choose her. And I can’t imagine how that could be wrong. The baby she is carrying is the bonus to everything.
In a weird way, I can understand my mother better now. My obsession with Emily is strong. I would do anything to have her. However, it is deeper than that. There is love that transcends everything else. It is something that I will always strive to do better.
A few weeks have passed since we got married, but I haven’t told anyone. The only people who know about it are Devereaux and Malone. Well, I have a feeling that Arlene is also in the know, but I don’t have confirmation of that.
“What do you mean you got nothing?” Dylan speaks from behind me. Becca’s neighbor told her there had been someone on the property, but we can’t see anything.
I am sitting at the computer in the large living room at the house I now share with only Sully. I close my eyes for minutes at a time, then jump right back into trying to figure things out for all of us. Thank God I got Sully with me today.
Emily has been staying at her dad’s, and it’s driving me crazy. She can’t go out anywhere, and when Becca visits with Arlene, Em is hiding upstairs in her room. We are trying to be as cautious about everything as possible.
“We both looked through the last twenty-four hours of footage,” I say, referring to both me and Sully. “We have two of the cameras in your yard pointing right at the area where Becca said the woman told her the intruder had been.”
“I’m going there today,” Sully adds.
“Where?”
“Jessica’s house,” he explains when Dylan eyes him funny. Jessica is Becca’s neighbor, the hot chick we saw a while back. “She called to inquire about installing a security system.”
Me and Sully got our security company going, and now we’re getting clients. He wanted to get started on it, kept on saying he needs an income and financial stability.
I space out for a second while Dylan mumbles something, when a lightbulb finally comes on in my head.
“They hacked us. We’ll have to beat them at their own game.”
Sully starts talking logistics right before he hits Dylan up to get involved in our small company.
“We want to make you an offer you can’t refuse,” he tells our former VP, but Dylan doesn’t look convinced.
“Which is…?”
“You become an equal partner in our security business.”
I am a little surprised at the offer Sully is putting on the table. We had talked about it, but not about splitting it all in three equal parts.
“There’s a catch,” I chime in.
Dylan gives me a knowing look. “There always is.”
“We need you to be the boss of it,” I throw at him really quick. This is the perfect solution. Neither me, nor Sully like running the business. It’s just too much. But we love the ground work, which I will be enjoying even more once this shit is over with.”
