Page 29 of Holiday Wedding
I check my phone, eager to see if Caleb’s responded yet. We’ve been texting constantly, sometimes just a funny meme or a simple heart emoji. No matter how big or small, each message brings a smile to my face. It’s good to know that even though we aren’t together, we’re still thinking about each other.
Give Pip a hug for me,Caleb texts back. I scroll through the rest of the messages. Alvina sent a photo of her eating lunch with her cousins by the marina. It doesn’t surprise me to see Wayne sitting next to her. I wonder if she told her family they’re dating? The thought that she confided to them before me shouldn’t make me jealous, but it does. I still haven’t talked to Alvina and Wayne about their relationship. The stubborn part of me is waiting for them to bring it up.
A minute later, Mom joins me with a plate of bacon grilled cheese sandwiches, my childhood favorite, in one hand and a pitcher of iced tea in the other.
“Thanks for cooking.” I help her set everything on the table.
“Are you sure you’re okay flying to New York tonight? I feel bad that you’ve been traveling so much for me.”
“I’ll be fine. I needed to check in on the house here, but the part of my trip I’m most excited about is your wedding. It’ll be beautiful.” Her eyes soften as she looks at me. “You’llbebeautiful, Gwen. A perfect bride.”
I flush, warmed by her compliment.Why, no matter how old I am, do I still crave her approval? Will that desire ever go away?
“I’m glad you could sneak over here for a few hours.” Mom spreads a napkin over her lap. “We’ll see each other at the wedding, but it’ll be so busy. It’s nice to have this alone time together. How’s your conference going?”
“Good.” Mimicking her, I take my napkin and smooth it over my legs. “I made a new friend, Helen Chu, who will be there. We met on the plane ride over. She recently joined a practice here in L.A. so she can be close to her family. She starts next month.”
“Oh, really?” Mom cuts her sandwich in two and picks up one half.
“She rented an apartment in Santa Monica, by the beach.”
Pip leans against my leg. I pass a piece of bacon down to her, and she gobbles it up greedily.
“A new friend? How wonderful, honey.” Mom pats my hand, beaming at me the way she did when I came home in sixth grade and told her I had met a girl named Jenny.
“It’s no big deal,” I say casually, while inside I bask in the glow of her attention. My happiness dims when I remember Skylar and Hannah. I didn’t make friends with them, that’s for sure.
“I might take Helen out for a drink some night while we’re in town. We could go to the club where Teddy’s bartending. He said they transform the place for Christmas, make everything holiday-themed.”
“That’s a great idea. She’ll appreciate you showing her around.” Mom takes a spoonful of sugar from the bowl on the table and swirls it into her tea with a long spoon, its metal clinking rhythmically against the side of the glass.
“How’s the wedding planning coming along?” she asks.
“Good, so far. Thank goodness for Marjorie. She’s been an enormous help, although everyone’s pitched in.” I bring out my phone and pull up my Notes app, where I keep my wedding to-do list. I read off it. “The venue is ready. Catering is confirmed. So are the photographer and DJ.”
I look over at Mom. “You’ll join Marjorie to choose the floral arrangements tomorrow when you get to New York. The florist said don’t order them too far in advance since the selection is always changing and we want the freshest ones.”
She nods with understanding. “I’ll go to the flower market straight from the airport.”
“Perfect. That place is huge, so Jenny and Dean can help, too. Caleb needs to pick out boutonnieres.” I make a note on my phone, a reminder to text my floral inspiration photos to Caleb’s mom later today.
“Oh!” I exclaim. “Don’t let me forget about the cufflinks.” In secret, I had asked Mom to give me my dad’s old cufflinks, the silver ones he wore on their wedding day. I’m planning on surprising Caleb with them the night before our wedding. Hopefully, when I see Caleb wearing them it’ll be a reminder that, although he’s gone, Dad’s still here with me in spirit.
“I’ve got them all packed up for you. In their original box and everything. It’s wonderful, how you want to honor your father.” Mom delicately nibbles on her sandwich. After she swallows, she clasps her hands together and says, “I’m thrilled you and Caleb are getting married. Seth was right. You two are a perfect match.”
Relief flows through me at her words. When Mom first heard about Caleb, she objected, but over the past couple of years she’s adjusted to the idea of us being together.
Mom continues, “Some days, I look at you and all I see is a little girl on roller skates with her pigtails flying. I’m excited for this wedding, but it makes me feel like I’m handing you over to Caleb and I’ll never get you back.” There’s moisture in her eyes when she’s done talking, and in mine too.
“Oh, Mom.” Sadness, grief, regret fill the space between us. “I felt the same way when you married Seth. I thought I would lose you, too.”
Mom’s mouth opens into an O of surprise. “Really? You never told me.”
She’s right. In the past, there have been things I didn’t tell her because I worried it would make her sad or afraid. I used to be a person who was more concerned about other people’s feelings than my own, but now I’m more confident, able to speak my mind. Being with Caleb helped with that.
“That’s exactly how I felt, but here we are. I haven’t lost you, and you haven’t lost me.”
She uses a napkin to dab at her watery eyes. “That’s true. Here we are.” She quietly blows her nose.
