Page 83 of Holiday Wedding
Before Justin can aim again, Caleb is on him, raining blows to his head, chest, and belly. The gun clatters to the floor as Justin raises his hands to defend himself. Caleb kicks it away with his foot, sending it spinning toward Jenny, who bends down and scoops it up. Now that Justin’s unarmed, the police come rushing over.
Jenny raises the pistol. She points it at Justin and shouts, “Stop! Don’t make me shoot you.”
When Justin sees that Jenny has the gun trained on him, his shoulders slump in defeat. The cops are on him in a flash, pulling out their handcuffs. They read him his rights.
Justin’s not listening to them, though. His head swings wildly.
“Lola?” he calls out, panicked. “Lola?”
Jenny, Caleb, and the officers stop what they’re doing. They look around as well, but Lola’s not there.
The dim container suddenly floods with light. I cry out and throw my arm over my stunned eyes. I’m falling, crumpling to my knees, but strong arms are there to catch me.
“I’ve got you,” says Dean. “You’re safe.”
36
Tuesday, December 24
Wedding Day
Jenny
The police have taken Justin away. They’re still searching for Lola, but they worry that she’s found a flight out of the country. Gwen’s off getting a quick medical check-up, with Pip in her arms. That little dog has growled and bared her teeth whenever we’ve tried to separate her from Gwen. Finally, we gave up. I’m talking to Gwen’s and Caleb’s families, going over everything that happened for the third time. When the shooting started, they had wisely grabbed the twins and fled the room.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see a muscular brown-haired man stride past without a glance my way. He heads for the elevators that lead to the buses and taxi stand.
Dean.
Caleb comes over with a stormy expression. His glare shoots daggers at Dean, who’s entered the elevator.
“What’s going on?” I ask Caleb.
“Dean just quit. Said he’d turn in the formal resignation letter later today.” Caleb directs his furious gaze at me. “I can’t deal with this right now. I need to make sure Gwen’s okay.”
The elevator doors begin to close. I get a glimpse of Dean facing forward, his face smooth, expressionless.Mr. Roboto is back.
“I’ll handle Dean,” I tell Caleb. “You go take care of Gwen.” Without waiting for Caleb to respond, I run to the elevator. I stick my foot between its closing double doors. They hit the edge of my sneaker and spring open.
Dean doesn’t say a word when I step inside. He doesn’t look at me or acknowledge my presence.
I wait for the door to close before I turn to him. The elevator shudders and begins its descent.
“What was that?” I demand, my lips pressed tight.
Nothing. No response. It’s like I’m not even there.
My brothers had this game they would play when I was a kid. They would ignore me and pretend I didn’t exist. I would shout in their faces, pinch their arms, and they wouldn’t flinch. They were so good at it that sometimes I almost believed them. I wondered if I was real or maybe I was a ghost? The leftover memory of someone who used to be alive. My brothers would continue that game for days, always when my parents weren’t looking. Eventually, when their silence got to be too much, I’d go to my room and, all alone, cry myself to sleep.
This, how Dean won’t respond to me, feels like that. Tears gather in the corners of my eyes. That old sadness, the feeling of worthlessness, rises so big it overwhelms me.
Forget this.
I reach for the elevator button, ready to give up on him. My plan is to stop and get out as soon as I can. The cool metal grazes my fingertips, when I notice Dean’s hands. They clench and unclench by his sides, full of restless energy. The rest of him is still, unmoving.
I pause, uncertain what my next move should be. Get off the elevator or stay on. Risk another failure or walk away. All my life, I’ve waited for someone to choose me. To pick me out from the crowd and give me their love. In that moment, I realize I’ve got it backward. I can’t control who decides to love me, but I can control who I love. I choose who to be with, who I let into my life. I take a deep breath, and…
I choose him.
