Page 90 of Holiday Love
One Year Ago
New York City
Chapter forty
Helen
Jamie trudges over to me, his head down like a kid caught stealing cookies. After a beat, he looks up with a solemn expression. “Helen,” he intones, like he’s addressing the United Nations. “I made a grave error in judgment, and I want to humbly apologize to you, and, if necessary, I’ll send flowers, write a sonnet, maybe even shave my head in penance.”
I arch an eyebrow. Lindsey snorts and shakes her head.
He glances at me, then at her, and drops the theatrics with a sigh. “Okay, seriously, I screwed up. I shouldn’t have touched Teddy’s phone. I thought I was protecting him, but it wasn’tmy choice to make. I’m sorry.”
Jamie’s a good bullshitter, but there’s regret there. Real regret. I see it in how his mouth twists, in how his eyes drop to the floor when he’s done talking.
“It’s not just your fault.” I look over his shoulder at Teddy, who stands a few feet away. “We could have communicated about it like adults, instead of dragging it out. I think we were both so insecure, not certain where we stood with each other and scared of getting hurt, that we let it stop us, but if we had talked this would have been cleared up months ago.”
Teddy nods in agreement.
A wave of regret hits me for all this wasted time nursing wounds that didn’t exist.
“Okay,” Teddy says, clapping his hands. “This has been fun, but it’s time for you both to go. Helen and I need to talk.”
“But we still need to study,” protests Jamie, although he’s already gathering his things.
“No more studying tonight,” Teddy declares. “Jamie, outnow. Lindsey, it’s been a pleasure to meet you—kinda—but, respectfully, please leave.”
Lindsey huffs, flicking her hair over her shoulder, but turns to go. She and Jamie exit together after saying good-bye.
“Let’s do lunch,” Lindsey tells me just before the door shuts and I lock it.
“Lunch?” Teddy arches a brow when I turn back to him.
“Yeah.” I don’t fight the smile that tugs at my lips. “I think I made a friend. I told her about my suspension, and she’s going to help me prepare for my review by the hospital. Her dad’s a lawyer so she’s going to get him to help too.”
“That’s great, Helen.” He walks toward me, cast and all, but the way he moves makes it feel like nothing could slow him down. I look at him, so confidentand handsome.
Nervous butterflies take flight in my belly, wild and rioting. “You said you wanted to talk?” I address the question to my hands, which are clasped before me.
Fingers are under my chin, tipping my head back until I’m staring into his beautiful sky-blue eyes.
“You texted me,” he whispers with something close to reverence, to awe. “You reached out. Didn’t give up on me.”
I nod into his hand. “I did. Twice.”
“What were you going to say?” His voice breaks, rough-edged with vulnerability. “When I called back?”
I answer honestly. “That I made a mistake. That I missed you. That I…wanted you. Wanted to get to know you better. To see where things went between us.”
“Do you know me now?”
Overwhelmed by emotion, by the intensity in how he looks at me, tears gather in the corners of my eyes. I take in a shuddering breath. “I do, and I—I like it, being here with you. This should be the worst time, with all the stress in my life, with how so many things have gone wrong, but somehow you made it okay. Just by being here, you make everything better.”
Gently, his thumb strokes my cheek, wiping away my tears.
Even with the tenderness I see in his expression, it takes courage to ask my question. “Wh—what would you have said? When you called me back?”
He smiles, small and a little wobbly. “This is what I would’ve said.”
