Page 37 of The Space He Left
That stung. Of course, I wanted to see my wife and baby. That should have been obvious. What was obvious was that I'dneglected my wife, and now she no longer wanted me in her life. I had to hope that was temporary because I couldn't imagine life without her.
I drove away from my own house, feeling like an exile from my own life. I needed somewhere to stay, somewhere to figure out how to rebuild everything I'd torn down. The Willowbrook Inn was the only hotel in town, a small place that catered mostly to tourists visiting the lake.
The desk clerk, a woman I recognized from high school, tried to hide her surprise when I asked for a room. "How long will you be staying, Mr. Henderson?"
"I don't know. A few days. Maybe longer."
She processed my credit card with careful professionalism, but I could see the curiosity in her eyes. Everyone in town would know by tomorrow that Jack Henderson was staying at the hotel instead of going home to his wife and new baby.
The room was small and generic, nothing like the warm, lived-in comfort of the home Harper and I had created together. I sat on the bed and looked around at the beige walls and mass-produced artwork, feeling the full weight of what I'd lost.
My phone buzzed. A text from Pete:Customers want to know when you'll be back. What should I tell them?
What should he tell them? That I'd spent two months neglecting my business while chasing a lie? That I'd missed my daughter's birth and probably lost my marriage in the process? That Henderson Construction, the company my father had built and trusted me to run, was falling apart because I couldn't tell the difference between helping someone and being manipulated?
Staying at the Inn. Drop off anything you want me to read today. I'll be in tomorrow morning to assess the damage.
Pete's response was immediate:Will do. It's bad, Jack. Really bad.
I set the phone aside and lay back on the unfamiliar bed, staring at another generic ceiling. Somewhere across town, Harper was probably home by now, surrounded by people who loved her and Emma. Her parents, maybe Sam, maybe other friends from town. A support system that had formed around her while I'd been absent.
I'd created this situation through my choices, my blindness, my inability to see what was right in front of me. Madison had lied to me, yes, but I'd chosen to believe her lies over Harper's truth. I'd chosen to prioritize Madison's manufactured crises over my wife's real needs.
And now I was alone in a hotel room while my wife and daughter were home without me.
The irony wasn't lost on me. For two months, I'd been terrified of Madison being alone, had convinced myself that she needed me to survive. Now I was the one who was truly alone, and it was exactly what I deserved.
But deserving it and accepting it were two different things. Harper had said I needed to decide what kind of father I wanted to be. She'd suggested it might be too late for us.
I pulled out my phone and started typing:
Harps, I know you don't want to talk to me, and I understand why. I know I have no right to ask anything of you after what I've done. But I want you to know that I'm going to do everything I can to become the man you and Emma deserve. I don't know if you'll ever forgive me, but I'm going to try to earn that forgiveness anyway, no matter how long it takes. You don't need to respond to this. Just know that I love you both, and I'm going to spend every day proving it.
I stared at the message for a long time before deleting it. Harper had been clear that she didn't want to talk. The last thing she needed was me pestering her with my guilt and promises.
If I wanted to prove I could listen to her, I needed to start by respecting her need for space.
Today, I would begin the long process of cleaning up the mess I'd made. I’d catch up on every missed email and everything Pete sent over. Tomorrow, I will face Pete and the damage to Henderson Construction. I would figure out how to rebuild my business and my reputation. I would try to become the kind of man who could be trusted with a family.
Tonight, I would sit alone in this hotel room and really understand, perhaps for the first time, the full cost of the choices I'd made.
The space between who I'd been and who I needed to become felt vast and insurmountable. Harper had said it might be too late.
But I had to try.
Chapter 12
RE: Harper Rose Henderson; Separation and Co-Parenting Arrangement for Emma Rose Henderson
Dear Mr. Henderson
Please be advised that this firm has been retained to represent Mrs. Harper Rose Henderson in all matters pertaining to your marriage and the co-parenting of your daughter, Emma Rose Henderson. This letter shall serve as formal notice that, as of the date of this letter, you and our client are legally separated.
At this time, our client wishes to establish the following non-negotiable terms, effective immediately:
Direct Contact:You are to cease any and all direct, personal communication with Mrs. Henderson. This includes, but is not limited to, phone calls, text messages, emails, and in-person contact not explicitly related to the pre-arranged exchange of your daughter.
Communication Protocol:All communication regarding the health, welfare, and logistics of Emma Rose Henderson shall be conducted exclusively through a mobile co-parenting app. The details of this app are attached. Communication is to be restricted to matters concerning your daughter only.
