Page 61 of Royal Pain
Chapter 21
Zan
“I need to address the nation,” my mother says.
Her face has changed over the last few days. I saw a ghost of this look after my father died. But now grief is etched in her skin. Sunken cheeks and eyes that look far away.
“Yes. They’re going to be wondering and we both know what about.”
My mother has started this new habit of pacing. Whenever she’s deep in thought or weighing the merits of something, she practically wears a path in the carpets.
“Where is he?”
“I spoke to him this morning and he said he’d be here around noon.”
Her eyes dart to the ornate clock on the mantle. It reads one twenty. Fucking Kwai. The whole becoming a man concept didn’t take. He returned to the house immediately after hearing the news, but I smelled alcohol and weed on his breath. I think his intentions were there, but Tarik’s death and the aftermath kicked him back to his default setting. There was a moment there when I thought his eyes were asking for forgiveness.
He’s suffering like the rest of us, and for that I have empathy. He’s not as equipped as I am. That’s the hard truth. My suffering has made me strong. Maybe I’m just pissed and it makes for harsh thoughts.
“Belinda comes today?” my mother asks out of the blue.
The thought of that first look improves my mood instantly. “Yes, the driver is picking her up at four.”
“I want to talk to you about her.”
That one surprises me. “Let’s talk.”
She comes and sits in the club chair.
“What happens going forward with you and Kwai will determine our country’s future. All life decisions must be made with that in mind.”
“What exactly are you saying?”
She locks eyes with me. “I’m saying you must consider more than your heart. Just make sure you choose your mate wisely. It wouldn’t do to have someone who can’t devote themselves to Mozia.”
I take in the information she offers, but it really doesn’t alter how I think of Belinda. I’ll keep that to myself for a while. Why is she even bringing it up? I can be with a commoner. I am a commoner.
“Everything we do now takes on a weighted meaning. Your time as prince is about to be redefined. Have you heard the grumblings?”
The queen always has had her ear to the ground. My father used to say she knows things before they happen. So what’s this?
“From whom?”
“Our people. They want to know who’s going to be king. And what’s our answer? I want to know too.”
“What are you saying?”
“Only that Kwai seems to be our only choice. And that’s a bad way to choose to be governed. The people know his ways.”
“Maybe he can rise to the occasion and opportunity. He’s not a bad person.”
She stands and resumes pacing. “You don’t have to tell me that. I gave birth to the boy. I love him as much as you or Tarik. But I’m not about to fool myself into thinking he could lead us. It would end badly for the people, for the country, and even for us.”
“What do you propose to do? I can’t ascend the throne.”
“I just want you to know I’m weighing the idea of…”
She pauses just long enough for me to know I’m about to hear some radical idea.
