Page 32 of The Sky in Summer
Van:Did I mention I had a great time?
Me:No. But I assumed it when you came three times.
Van:We can do better than that. Want to break our record?
Me:Yes. But not tonight. The boys have a baseball game at six.
Van:Oh. Sam, my nephew is on the team. This is perfect. I will see you there, beautiful.
This time I am not offended, nor do I doubt his choice of words. He makes me feel beautiful. More than I have ever felt before. My vow of friendship is in jeopardy. Already. One night. It took one night for the walls around me to begin to crumble. That’s not good. Okay, I was required to entertain that thought, just so I can say to myself I did. But the force behind my previous stance is nowhere to be seen. Or felt.
The hours between four and eight fifty-five have crawled. Even though since I have gotten atop the bed, fully dressed, I have been filling out forms for the twins and ordering groceries online. Those tasks didn’t completely erase what crowded my mind. Van, Pepe Le Pew, and Rowdy, all pushed each other aside for their deserved spots in my memory. But it was Van who had the greatest presence.
I sigh at the images of last night that have played on a loop in my mind. God, the man is unbelievable. A mirage maybe. Except I remember every nuanced part of him. The warm olive-toned flesh. The way he said my name. How his thumbs angle up at the tip. How he looked when he came. It was for me and by me, and that fact has made everything so much bigger. It was as if I pleased him more than any other woman before me. Is that a truth I see, or a lie I am telling myself? It could be a talent he has to make women feel that way. We would all fall for it and him.
The sound of my cell stops any further discussion between me, myself, and I.
“Hi,” I say softly.
“Hi, babe.”
There’s a fraction of a pause on my part.
“I was trying it on. We’re still friends.”
“Okay.”
“What are you doing?” he says, ignoring the step closer we just took.
“Getting Tyler and David’s SAT tutoring forms filled out.”
“Man, you have to do that early. There’s still two years till college, right?”
“Our planning started when they were toddlers. We had to get them into a good preschool, then on and on.”
“You’re a great mother. It shows.”
“Thanks. It is the hardest job there is. That’s just my opinion.”
“Is their father as dedicated as you?”
“Yeah. They don’t have a chance between the two of us.”
“He seemed like a nice guy.”
“He is nice and an excellent father. We just weren’t good together.”
“How long were you married?”
“Seven years. So what about you? Any ex-wives? Or children?”
“Hell no.”
He says that a little too firmly. But why does it matter?
“Sounds like you made the right decision for yourself.”
Now it’s Van who pauses.
