Page 61 of The Sky in Summer
“Who had the worst score?” Teddy asks.
“I am sorry to announce the patriarch of our family went down in flames. Sorry, Dad. You only got two right and one of them was your own.”
“I don’t give a flying fuck!”
Aurora shoots him a look, which he addresses amidst the laughter at the table.
“I don’t! I am happy tonight. And they are old enough to hear the word fuck when it is used properly.”
“Get off, Grandpa!” Sam calls.
“Get off what?”
All four teenagers start laughing.
“It means ‘you tell ‘em, Grandpa,” Teddy explains.
“Mets des ‘epis de mais dans ton cul. Know what that means?”
“I do,” Van says. “It speaks to the placement of a corncob in a bodily orifice.”
But the insult misses its mark, because they think whatever he says is just more proof Gaston Lyon is cool.
“Want to know who was lying and who told the truth?” Parish changes the direction of the conversation.
It is unanimous. We all do. Scarlett holds the first picture up.
“Let’s start with Horace Bedstone, or should I say Carl Temple. He was NOT a marathon runner. He owned a landscaping business in Virginia. You lied!” she says, pointing a finger at Sam.
“Good one!” Aurora says. “You almost fooled me.”
Scarlett turns to Aargon. “And Beverly Talbot was NOT an English stage actress, but a nurse in Kentucky. And her name was Eliza Tapper.”
“Nurse Ratchet,” Gaston says, laughing at her expression.
“I kinda sound like Maury Povich, don’t I?” Scarlett asks. “You are NOT the father!”
Her attention turns to Teddy. “Now we come to Peter Piper. It IS his real name, and he IS a horror film Director and MURDERER!”
She stretches the word out. There are comments all around the table.
“You were telling the truth? I thought that was the most obvious lie,” Sam says.
“And Peter Piper is his actual name? Unbelievable.”
Teddy wears a smile of self-satisfaction.
“Next we come to Van. He WAS telling the truth! Brad Bradley started the Children of the Almighty, a cult in California and the western states that lasted for twenty years.”
“Probably because of that stupid name. It started badly for Mr. Bradley,” Van says chuckling.
“Oscar McDoogle, David’s subject, was NOT married to a hot actress, or any other kind. He is the President of the LGBTQ organization in Reno, Nevada. And his real name is Bill Taylor.”
“You really had me fooled,” Van says to David. “You laid it out with confidence. Good one.”
“That’s what she said,” Teddy adds, making us all laugh.
“Oh, God.” Aargon rolls his eyes.
