Page 38 of From Ice to Grace
Nothing else. At least…nothing to me.
My brother clears his throat. “What should I call you then?” EJ asks with a tight smile.
“That, my friend, is your sister,” Declan says, his gaze settling on me. For a flicker of a second, something unsettled flashes in his dark brown eyes—like he’s not entirely sure who or what he’s looking at. “And nobody should date their sister.”
I’m not sure whether to be offended or shocked that he’s agreeing with me on something. At least he didn’t say ‘your’ sister—as in nobody should date your sister.
EJ looks at Declan with a clear warning in his eyes before he turns back to me.
“Maybe it’s time for a dance, don’t you think?” he asks, taking my hand and all but dragging me to the dancefloor before I can even give him an answer.
At least Hannah and Lucas join in, so we’re not the only ones making a spectacle of ourselves. Lindgren sees this as his chance to ask one of the guests to dance too—an older woman with a tight french twist and diamond chandeliers hanging from her ears.
Declan and his date are still standing on the side, his gaze not leaving us for a second. I try my best to ignore him, but it’s hard knowing he’s trying to unnerve me.
“What’s going on between the two of you?” EJ asks suddenly, his voice sharp and tinged with accusation.
“What?” My head snaps toward him.
“You and Murphy.” EJ nods to where Declan is still standing, staring at us. “First the whole charade at dinner and now this.”
“What charade at dinner?” There was definitely no charade. Maybe a kick beneath the table, but that’s just because Declan is tall and his legs were everywhere. “He’s your teammate, EJ. Your friend. He’s nothing to me.”
The words feel strange. Like they might not be true. Which is pure insanity in and of itself. They are true. Then why does it feel false?
“I’m just trying to look out for you, lillasyster.” He sighs. “I don’t want you to make the same mistake twice.”
The reminder slams me in the chest. Heat creeps up my neck as I look at my brother who might be trying to issue a friendly warning, but instead it’s sounding like a condescending reminder of my poor life choices.
Anger sears through me, white and hot. “You know what, you can be a real jerk sometimes.”
“What?” he asks, looking genuinely perplexed. “I’m just trying to help.”
“Help?” I bite out the word. “You’re the one who introduced me to Axel, who brought him around every day, who vouched for him in more ways than one. And now, since I’ve been here, you’ve insisted that I accompany you to these events. You casually tell me not to date your teammates, but insist I go to your games. You dragged me into your social life and now you’re upset about me talking to your friends.”
“That’s not…” he trails off, shaking his head. “That’s not what I meant, Avah. And Axel…” he trails off, his gaze leaving mine as his mind runs a thousand miles an hour. “Let’s just have a good time, okay?”
Our lives have always been tangled. His friends were my friends, his teammates a constant in our home. If he really wanted distance, why has he continued to include me in his life? I’ve seen him with Liz, and even if it’s not that serious, he could’ve asked her to be his date instead of me.
“Why are you doing this?” I ask him, pulling back slightly. I search his eyes, desperate for an answer. Before he can hide it, before he can slam a wall back up between us, there’s a glimpse of sympathy…pity.
My stomach twists.
“Because it’s easier to have you here,” he says, avoiding my gaze and running his hand through his hair. “Dates are drama. I don’t need drama in my life.”
“EJ,” I force him to look at me. After staring into my brother’s eyes for another two seconds the answer is clear. The truth heavy as it settles in my chest.
I step back, pulling free from his hold. Realization hits, followed by a surge of humiliation and anger, cementing everything I’ve been thinking about myself with that one look on his face.
“You’re doing this because of what happened with Axel,” I mutter, as the realization hits. Every time EJ has begged me to be his date to some function, every game, every practice...it wasn’t because he wanted my company or valued my support. It wasn't even because he wanted me to meet and mingle with the people in his life. No, it’s because he felt pity for his little sister.
“No, Avah—” EJ tries to reach out but I step away before he can touch me. “All I’ve ever wanted was for you to get out a bit. I wanted you to see what’s out there, find friends, and enjoy life again.”
“You don’t have to take care of me, EJ. I can take care of myself.”
“I never said you couldn’t,” he says, shaking his head.
“You didn’t have to say it,” my voice raises slightly, and I catch myself. “This is all because of pity?” I ask, suddenly feeling even more self-conscious in this stupid dress I’ve been tugging on all evening. I thought I was doing him a favor when in reality he was feeling sorry for me. My gaze lands on Hannah and Lucas where they’re still dancing. She’s my only friend, and now even that feels forced and orchestrated by my overbearing brother.
