Page 46 of Composed at Randy's
I'm going fast when I make it to the dressing room, so my entrance is on the dramatic side, and it makes Trina shout, “Jesus Christ on a pogo stick, Bael!” when I slam the door open.
“I need your car,” I say, bouncing up and down on my heels impatiently.
“I'm sure you do, lover boy. I caught your speech, and if my heart wasn't made of coal, I would have had an emotion. If you try a little harder next time, I might care. Sadly, you fell short, so no dice.”
Normally this is one of the things I love about Trina. She isn't moved by fame or fortune. She has her own set of priorities and can't be moved unless she wants to be. This means that the fact that she likes me is beyond precious. Unfortunately, it also means I can't bully her into letting me borrow her car.
“Name your price, Trina. I don't care what you want. If I can give it to you, it's yours.”
Trina knows she has me over a barrel, and I don't have time to play games. She knows I can't hire a car myself or take any kind of public transportation. The few times I've tried, it’s been such a disaster that Harvey actually threatened to quit if I did it again. He really meant it too.
I like Harvey and I don't want him to quit. Besides, if he quits, he won’t be able to help me find Wren.
“Get me a date with Harvey.”
Wow.
Like… holy shit, wow.
I don't have the time to unpackthatright now. I swear to you, until this exact second, I thought Trina was a lesbian. You learn something new every day, I guess.
“Done.” I don't know how I'm going to do it, but I don't go back on my word, so I know eventually I’ll make it happen.
“AndI'mdriving. I also get to pick the music, you're riding in the back, and don't even think about talking to me. I’m off the clock as soon as my butt hits the driver’s seat.” Trina pokes me in the chest so hard I flinch and finishes with, “You are damn lucky I was planning on going back to Boston tonight in the first place.”
Trina is prickly as hell, but she wouldn't have said yes at all if she didn't like me, so I don't get my feelings hurt.
“Deal.”
I'm on pins and needles the entire time Trina finishes packing up. I'm smart and only suggest to her once that she should let a techie do it for her. Her glares are like razors to the soul and just one of them is enough to shut up the devil himself.
I obediently allow her to make me her packhorse and carry all of her stuff to the car. Thank god, she only made me bring the important stuff, otherwise there would have been no room for me or her in the car. But she's protective about her brushes, combs, and other tools, so those had to come with us.
It’s closer to early morning than it is to late evening when we’re packed and ready to go, but I don’t complain because we’re still leaving earlier than I could have managed alone. I really,reallywant to though. I swear she took her time just to be mean.
“You better be as quiet as a mouse back there,” Trina says as she buckles herself in.
I mime zipping my mouth shut, and we’re finally on our way to Boston.
So you know that song I've been working on? The one that really took off as soon as I met Wren? It's louder now. So much louder.
It's kind of angry now, too.
I'm mad. I think I'm also hurt. I spent most of the time until now scared and worried, but Wren agreed to be my boyfriend and then ditched me immediately after. Why didn't he say something before he left?
What if I don't find him before he makes himself sick and collapses again?
I have my headphones on and open my music notation app. I haven't written any of my new song down yet. Until now it's all been in my head, but it's so loud that if I don't get it out, it'llcome out on its own, and then Trina will kick me out of her car, and I’ll have to walk to Boston.
I space out and let the music do its thing. All the beautiful parts of the past few days, the scary ones, the sexy ones—every bit of it goes into this song. It's not like my normal stuff. Most of my songs are high energy with an edge of anger because writing is how I get out all of my feelings about my bullshit childhood.
There's a reason why I'm in a goth band, after all.
This song is more delicate. More vulnerable.
I'm just so fucking in love with Wren, you guys.
And right now, ithurts. It hurts so much that if I wasn't pouring this into the song, I'd be howling at the moon.
