Page 53 of Killer of the Bells
As I put the food away, I was continually surprised by how perfectly aligned with my preferences the shipment was. So much so that I went through my emails and bank statements to make sure I hadn’t been the one who ordered it while I was asleep or something.
But nope, it wasn’t me, so either someone really wanted to do something nice for me, or they wanted to do me in. It probably wasn’t the latter.
It was never the latter.
Apparently, the power of positive thinking was a load of shit when it came to wanting to be murdered.
Not that I wanted to be murdered by a rando anymore. It was just an old thought pattern kicking around, not ready to dissipate yet.
After putting the food away, I made one of the meals, and it was freaking amazing. So amazing that it made me sleepy. I’d been crashing out in weird places a lot lately, so I indulged myself by climbing into my bed for a quick nap, making sure to set an alarm so I didn’t miss the hunt later.
When I crawled into my bed, it was glorious. It smelled so good I could have cried. It reminded me of my new sweater, and I wondered if the smell had transferred somehow when the sweater was on my bed while I was showering earlier.
An hour later, I was awake and refreshed and ready to fuck up a lot of people’s nights.
I was doing it. I was going to win.
I crept up to the churchyard using a different parking location and route than the last time. Don’t create patterns, folks. It’ll get you caught.
I was one of the first people there, probably because most hunters liked to show up at the last possible second, thinking the element of surprise would be on their side. I’d found that it was a great way to create utter chaos when everyone decided to be a surprise all at once.
My traps always fed well during the first few minutes of the hunt, and tonight was no exception. It was hilarious watching helpless little feet kicking and flailing about as their owner wiggled and tried to free themselves from my nets. And when a row of dart traps took out multiple people, the sound they made as they fell was like ASMR to my nervous system. Thump, thump, thump, down they went.
Beautiful.
Once I identified an exploitable path in the chaos, I made for it, staying low, slow, and silent as I went.
I was the first one to the door, and I slipped inside, stealthy as a mouse, barely opening the door, barely making a sound. Any sound I did make was buried under the sounds of fighting, so I was in the clear.
Or so I thought. When I turned to face the ground floor of the tower, I was confronted by three minmaxers, all with glowing hands and eyes.
Well, fuck.
Two of them had pained expressions on their faces, and one of them simply seemed resigned.
I couldn’t begin to fathom why, because I was me, and let me tell you, folks, I am not a threatening person to behold. In my experience, I give offdisqualified from the draft on sightvibes. I’m stronger than I look, but considering how wimpy I look, I’m not sure that means much.
So, when the minmaxers in front of me all looked like they would rather be anywhere but there, I was puzzled. I didn’t let that slow me down, though.
I fired tranq darts from my homemade gauntlets and raced for the stairs. If I made it, there was a rope trap that would take out at least one of them if they followed me.
It might have been my imagination, but it seemed like one of the minmaxers didn’t try to dodge and went down immediately, while another one seemed to dive into one of my darts on purpose. The third one dodged artfully and then scowled like he’d fucked up somehow.
I didn’t worry about it because I was busy legging it to the stairs. I may seem wimpy, folks, but I am fucking fast. I’d been working on it for years, specifically for the hunt.
If you can’t fight head-on, be tricky, sneaky, and hard to catch.
I made it past my first trap, but so did the third minmaxer. He was right behind me as I bolted up the stairs. He managed to avoid all of my traps, likely because he saw me avoiding them. The only trap he triggered was a sticky net, and he only got the tail end of it, so all it did was slow him down.
Usually by this time in the hunt, other hunters would have breached the door, but I didn’t hear the sounds of dozens of people pouring through the door.
Weird.
It was a weird night in general. I would have called it too easy if I wasn’t running for my life up six flights of stairs.
Cardio, folks. Don’t underestimate it. Stick it in your workout routine. Trust me.
The minmaxer was breathing down my neck the whole way and had managed to grab my jacket just as I made it to the top of the tower. I’d only been so close one other time, and I couldtaste victory. If I could just tranq the guy trying to grapple me, I’d be in the clear.
