Page 14 of A Christmas Temptation for the Duke
“And it was just as funny now as it was then.” Daniel shook his head to himself at the memory, chuckling along to see how upset it made Violet even now.
“You’re changing the subject,” she pivoted back.
“Is it that obvious?”
“Tell me what is troubling you – the truth,” she demanded of him, arms folded, an eyebrow raised in warning. “Otherwise, I might just ask you to leave. Although in your mind, that will probably be considered a reward. So perhaps I will force you to stay.”
“Speaks to how highly you prize your own company.”
“Speaks to how little you value the company of others,” she shot back. “Come on then, while we are young. Since arriving, yourmind has been a million miles away and dare I say that I am starting to worry.”
“You always were sentimental.”
“One of us has to be.”
Daniel had six younger sisters, but it was no surprise or secret that Violet was his favorite. And that wasn’t to say that he did not like the others, more that he and Violet had always gotten along the best. They were the closest in age, and their bond was forged in the fires of a not-so-pleasant upbringing through which they were always there to look out for one another.
For that reason, she was the only person in this world who Daniel felt truly comfortable talking to. So much that he almost considered telling her what was on his mind and why he was having such a hard time concentrating.
Alas, it’s going to be a lie this time, one that she will sense, just as she will sense that for once she should not push. Some secrets are better left unspoken, especially when those secrets are as confusing as they are unexpected.
“It’s nothing to concern yourself with,” Daniel assured her with a dismissive wave of his hand. “It’s just this time of year, is all. My thoughts dwell on Christmas Eve and all I’ll need to do before then.”
Violet cocked an eyebrow at him. “Is that so?”
“Indeed,” he said, fixing his own eyes on her so she might just believe the lie… or at least understand that he was lying for good reason. “I know you are a guaranteed guest, but what of the others? How am I to prepare an evening for a dozen people if half of them might not even turn up?”
She narrowed her eyes, no doubt wondering if she should push. Thankfully, understanding passed behind Violet’s eyes and she nodded at his answer as if she believed it for even a second.
Thank God that she knows me as well as she does.
“Oh, it will be fine,” she said, waving him down. “Likely, they will be so surprised that you are choosing to host them in the first place that they will insist on being there. If for no other reason than to prove the truth of it.”
“What does that mean?”
Violet’s raised eyebrow this time indicated condescension. “Come now, Daniel. It is no great secret that you have been somewhat…” She clicked her tongue with consideration. “Withdrawnthese past two years. A veritable ghost, for how social you have been.”
“I have been busy.”
“Busy hiding,” she corrected. “And don’t try and tell me otherwise. Just as you should not waste your breath making up excuses for the reason, because they are well known.”
“Are they now?” he scoffed.
Violet sighed and then rested her hand on his leg in comfort. “Our mother’s death has affected us all, Daniel. Each in our own way. But you knew mother best, just as you know that she would not want her death to have broken you as it clearly has.” She fixed him with a look of concern. “Hiding away, shutting yourself off from the world, is no way to live.”
It was two years ago now when Daniel’s mother died. Indeed, her death saddened him greatly, as she was always that rock which was there to lean on when times were at their hardest. And it was after she died that Daniel removed himself fully from the world, which explained well enough why Violet thought this to be the reason for his morosity.
If only things were that simple…
“I have been busy,” he repeated, speaking into his chest. “And now that I am not so, I thought it right to remind you that I am indeed alive and well. As concerned for me as you are.”
“More than you know,” Violet assured him.
It had been months since Daniel visited his favorite sister. And even longer since he had visited any of the other five. But it wasn’t personal, nor was it because he had been ‘busy’ as he claimed.
Daniel had a painful history where his sisters were concerned. One that brought him so much shame that, as horrid as it was to say, he was happy to use his mother’s death as an excuse to distant himself from them.
Deep down, he suspected his sisters knew this. In many ways, he hoped that they did. What he had done to them… nothing would make it right. He did not want it to be made right. What he wanted was to explain to them how sorry he was. Not because he sought forgiveness – he did not deserve such things -- but because it was right to do so.
