Page 51 of Blindsided
He shrugs again. “If I’m being completely honest, it’s probably because we shagged last night and you sucked my cock like a champion this morning.”
I can’t help it. I giggle-snort like a fool. “You are such an ox, do you know that?”
“And you’re an ungrateful passenger.”
The car goes quiet for a minute before I ask, “So are you just dropping me off at home?”
Mac get a salacious grin on his face. “We’re going shopping first.”
My mood darkens. “I do not want to try on any more clothes for you, Mac. Look, I’m wearing a skirt today!” I state, pointing down at the black pencil skirt that sits just above my knees.
“Oh believe me, Cookie. I noticed. You in that skirt was on my mind all day long.” He shoots me a naughty wink. “We’re not shopping for clothes. We’re shopping for food.”
As Freya and I meander around the supermarket, she starts firing questions at me about Scotland. “Why on earth do you think it’s a good idea to bring the ladies on your stag weekend to Scotland? Don’t you think it’s going to be obvious?”
“Don’t I think what is going to be obvious?” I ask as I drop a tray of fresh strawberries and a can of whipping cream into the trolley Freya is pushing along.
“That we’ve…beenintimate,” she says on a whisper and looks around nervously as though our fellow shoppers can hear her.
“No, I don’t,” I reply with a shrug. “I can act completely normal around you. Just look at me now, walking around a store and not shouting at the top of my lungs that my cocker has been inside you in the last twenty-four hours.”
Freya’s eyes go wide as she aggressively shushes me. To my delight, I watch her adorable ears turn as red as the strawberries in the trolley.
“Are you the one we have to worry about?” I ask with a lascivious smirk. “Are you going to have trouble keeping your hands off of me? I’m sure now that you’ve tasted the Loch Ness monster yourself, it’s going to be nearly impossible for you to control your urges.”
Freya rams the trolley into my shins.
I bite my fist to stop myself from screaming in agony. “Do I need to remind you that my legs are worth a bit of money?”
“Do I need to remind you that you sound completely ridiculous when you refer to your penis as the Loch Ness monster?”
As those words escape Freya’s lips, a flash of movement catches my eye, and we both look over to see a wee blond-haired boy, who can’t be more than six years old, staring directly up at us, listening to our entire exchange. His mother stands just behind him, looking outraged. With a scathing look, she drags the wee lad away, no doubt thinking we’re a couple of perverts, and I hear his wee voice repeat, “Is my penis called the Loch Ness monster too, Mummy?”
I turn accusing eyes at Freya. “You scarred that wee boy for life. Are you happy?”
“Quite,” she replies, jutting out her chin defiantly. “Hopefully, he’ll not grow up to be disillusioned into ever thinking his penis is a mythological monster.”
I shake my head from side to side, a smile growing on my face. “You’re going to have to stop being mean to me, Freya, or I’m going to fall in love with you.”
Freya’s anger disappears. “What?”
I shoot her a wink. “I get a stiffy for the mean ones.”
She blinks at me strangely while I grin and turn to continue our shopping excursion, grabbing all the necessary supplies that we’ll need for tonight’s festivities, which Freya still knows nothing about.
When we’re checking out, Freya says quietly to me, “Do sexually experienced people have a sixth sense about ex-virgins?”
“What?” I ask, looking down at her, and trying—and failing—not to laugh.
“Never mind,” Freya says, her cheeks turning red as she glances at the man ringing up our food.
I grasp her arm to turn her attention back to me. “No, no, repeat yourself.”
She glances around nervously before leaning up to whisper, “Like, can they sense I had sex in the way police dogs can smell drugs?”
I school my face and try not to laugh too hard at my dear, sweet, innocent friend. “Not to my knowledge, Cookie.”
She shakes her head, rejecting my response. “I swear Allie could tell. She said I looked different, and she knows about my lack of experience, so I feel like maybe she knew.”
