Page 101 of Blindsided
She tenses against my shirtless body and turns back to look at me. “What?”
I exhale heavily and run my finger along the freckles on her nose. “I just…I have to know.”
She blinks nervously while toying with the hem of her shirt. “Why?”
I frown as my arms tighten around her. “Because I’m a fucking caveman, okay? Can you just get it over with and tell me? I’m not going to be angry…just rip it off like a plaster.”
Her lips twitch with barely concealed amusement. “How many women were you with when we were apart?”
I stiffen around her body. “Are you fucking kidding me?”
She turns over, so she’s now lying on her belly over my chest and watches me expectantly. “Don’t tell me you were celibate for two months.”
“Cookie, I’ve been celibate since the moment I met you, just confirming the fact that I’ve been hopelessly in love with you from the beginning.” I reach out and tug on her adorable pink ear. “After I had you, I couldn’t even look at another woman without aching for your body and your smile. Hell, I even missed the way you smack my chest when you’re angry at me. So I stayed as far away from women as I could the entire time I was in Glasgow.”
She chews her lip nervously and looks down, tracing my nipples with her fingertips. “So you never even dated anyone? Flirted?”
I reach down and crook my finger under her chin, forcing her to look at me. “The closest I got to any women were my mother and Tilly. Now you. Confess your sins.” My hands lower, and I squeeze her sides playfully causing her to giggle and squirm on my groin, which in turn causes my cock to demand a second round. But he must be ignored because I want to hear this.
When I notice Freya’s cheeks pink up with anxiety, my disposition softens. Maybe I’m putting too much pressure on her. If she slept with several men while we were apart, I can’t blame her for that. I was a complete arse, and it would be natural for her to be curious after waiting so long to have sex in the first place.
I lean forward and press a kiss to her forehead. “It’s all right, Cookie. I understand if you wanted to explore other options.” I kiss her again and add with waggling eyebrows, “Just tell me I’m the best cock you’ve ever had, and we can move on.”
Her face immediately lightens as she pins me with a look and replies, “You’re the best cock I’ve ever had.”
I thrust my fist upward, feeling victorious. “God, please put that on my tombstone someday, even if you are lying to me.”
Freya goes quiet, looking down at her hands clasped on top of my chest as she adds, “Also you’re still the only cock I’ve ever had.”
I watch her for a few seconds, my brows pinched in confusion. “But in my bedroom back in Dundonald, you said…”
She shrugs, glancing up at me, a sad look flitting across her face. “I was just trying to hurt you as much as you hurt me.”
I swallow the painful lump in my throat. “It fucking worked.”
She reaches out to press her hand against my cheek, whispering, “I’m sorry.”
I turn my head and kiss the inside of her palm, letting her know I forgive her as she has forgiven me. “So, who the fuck was that Jasper guy tonight?”
Freya inhales deeply. “He was actually the first and only date I went on since you left for Scotland. I set up my online dating account after that game I attended of yours in Glasgow, but even though I hated you, I could never manage to swipe right on anybody.” She scrunches her nose as she continues, “The only reason I went out with Jasper was because I didn’t want to spend my actual birthday with Allie and the Harris hoard. Having a date seemed less pathetic, and he looked like the safest choice.”
“He did at that,” I state glumly as her words hit me square in the gut. I reach out and tuck her hair behind her ear, my finger trailing along her warm earlobes. “I should have been here for you. I should have done better. You should have never doubted who you were going to be spending your birthday with.”
Her eyes become glossy as she looks up at me. “I hated not being there for you during your grandad’s funeral. Watching you with your parents and sister at the gravesite, it physically hurt me that I couldn’t be beside you, holding your hand.”
“I didn’t even know you were at the burial,” I state, a melancholy washing over me at the memory of that day. “I was a mess then, Freya. I was holding on so hard to what I thought was the right way to live based on stuff my grandfather told me as a wee lad. Even at the end, he told me I was being a fool for not going after you. And then you showed up at the funeral, and I thought that was my chance to make it all better.
“I shouldn’t have told you I loved you in my room that day. It was the wrong time, and my head was in the wrong place.” I reach out and pull her up to me, needing to hug my apology out with my body just as much as my words. I pull back and hold her face when I add, “And I hate myself for what I said to you in my car. The idea that you could ever just be sex to me is utter shite. I was so damn in love with you, but I couldn’t put it into proper words yet.”
She holds my hand against her cheek and smiles. “You’re doing a pretty good job making up for it now.”
“I love you, my wee treasure. I love you more than I knew I was capable of loving someone. Nothing about you and me has been expected.”
I press my lips to hers in a soft, sensual kiss. She hums a sexy noise when my lips move down her neck and pull her nightgown away to kiss her bare shoulder. Growling in satisfaction, I continue kissing my way across her skin, murmuring against her flesh, “The way you make me crave you…the sex…the way we come together…” My lips part as my hands move from her face and slide down her neck, brushing over her ribs and wrapping around to fondle her sweet, round arse. “…it’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced with another person.”
My lips brush across hers as I add, “I know you don’t have experience with other men, but you need to know…what you and I have…I’d trade all my past experiences for just one night with you.”
Slowly, I pull up the bottom of her shirt and allow my greedy palms to squeeze the flesh of her sweet supple arse. Her breath quickens, thickening my cock between us as she rocks into my grasp over and fucking over again.
