Page 132 of Honeymoon Phase
I shoot my dad a watery smile. “I’ll be fine as long as you get me down that aisle.”
My dad grabs my hands and stands up. “I got you, Addie May.”
Chapter 44
Fact or Fiction?
This marriage is fiction.
Luke
I watch my niece Everly walk my mom down the snow-covered aisle, forcing a smile I know she doesn’t feel. My mom, on the other hand, feels every bit of her happiness as she takes her seat and gives me a wave and a hearty thumbs-up, completely oblivious to the absolute pain shredding through my heart right now.
I have to marry the woman I love today...
Who is planning to divorce me tomorrow.
Life is a fucking bitch.
I glance out at the guests all covered in blankets and wearing their winter coats. Crisp, mountain air dances in front of their lips as they speak quietly to each other. The snow-dusted evergreens all around us are beautiful, but I can’t appreciate them like I normally do. In fact, every beautiful snowy image today feels like an extra stab through my frozen heart.
I glance over at my three brothers standing beside me. They’re outfitted in their Sunday best as they watch their ladies walk down the aisle one by one. They all gaze at their person with love and adoration even though two of them were in the doghouse—or the barn—with me last night.
But they still love each other.
They worked through it.
And they found forgiveness.
If only I could have been so lucky.
Ethan is next and he’s looking sharp in his dark green suitwhile pulling Stevie in a wagon covered in fluffy tulle. Stevie has my heart ready to burst as she smiles big and toothless in her blue-and-yellow flannel dress with a matching stocking cap on top.
Ethan pulls the wagon up to my mom, running over her foot in the process. Everly jumps up to help get them settled beside her and then Sharon, the officiant, tells everyone to rise.
The music shifts to the song “Can’t Help Falling in Love” sung by Kina Grannis, which I handpicked for today when I thought this was going to be the happiest day of my life. Now it’s taunting me with a love story that doesn’t have a happy ending.
When Addison and her father round the corner, my heart stops, and the world disappears. All I see is her gliding toward me, looking like fresh snow against the wintery landscape. Her dark hair is swept over to one side, curled and loose down one shoulder. Her long lashes fan her rosy cheeks, and her shoulders peek out above the white fur shawl wrapped around her arms. White Converse sneakers peek out under her skirt, and I’d laugh... if only I wasn’t crying.
Calder taps me on the shoulder and hands me a handkerchief, which I use. I’m crying about so many things. I’m crying because she’s the most beautiful woman in the world. I’m crying because she’s my best friend and I’m lucky to know her. And I’m crying because I’ll never have her in the way I want, but at least I’ll have her as my friend.
I would take Addison Monroe as a friend over nothing at all. And if that’s all she’s willing to give me, I’ll hang on to it with everything in my heart. I will grow comfortable with this sense of longing. It will be my constant companion and that’s okay. I would rather this throb of yearning live inside me if it allows me to keep her in my life. She’s worth it for me.
Sharon welcomes everyone to the service and tells us all whywe’re gathered here before asking, “Who gives this woman in marriage?”
“I do,” John says firmly and then surprises me when he steps toward me and holds his hand out.
I stab my fingers into my eyes to see more clearly as I shake his hand, not expecting that gesture from him. He pats me on the back and gives me a small smile.
Addison and I turn to face each other, and I struggle to make eye contact with her, knowing that looking her in the eyes will only make repeating the vows the officiant wants us to repeat even more difficult.
When it’s finally time to say our vows, Sharons asks us to take each other’s hands. Addison passes her bouquet back to Dakota and when Sharon says, “Addison, repeat after me,” Addison holds her hand up.
“Actually, can we do our own vows?”
My eyes snap up as I look at my friend, who’s staring nervously at the officiant.
Sharon looks to me and then back to Addison. “Of course, dear. This is your day.”
